JOKE COLLECTION 03 - Light bulb jokes jokes

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JOKE COLLECTION 03
Q:  How many Jo Brands does it take to change a lightbulb?
A:  None, you give it to a bloody man to do, cos it's a piece of cake, isn't it? Well, no, actually, that expression is crap isn't it, because if you had a piece of cake, you'd bloody well eat it, wouldn't you?

Q:  How many DIY buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:  Only one, but it takes him two weekends and three trips to the hardware store.

Q:  How many recovering addicts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:  One, but it takes twelve steps.

Q:  How many recovering addicts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:  One, as long as he admits he's powerless over light bulbs.

Q:  How many recovering addicts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:  One to screw it in and one to sponsor him.

Q:  How many Soviet emigres does it take to change a light bulb?
A:  Four. One to stand on a chair and hold the bulb, two to lift the chair by its legs, one to call an American and to ask which way to turn the chair.

Q:  How many light bulbs does it take to change a Soviet emigre?
A:  One, if you aim well.