police jokes jokes

Two guys were walking along a road in Georgia when they were struck by a police car driven by a drunken cop.

One guy was thrown through the windshield and his buddy was knocked down an embankment.

The first guy was charged with breaking and entering and the second with leaving the scene of an accident.

A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar.

A $40 speeding ticket was included.

Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40.

The police responded with another mailed photo -- of handcuffs.

A policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but was not getting many.

Then, he discovered the problem; a 10 year old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign which read, "SPEED TRAP AHEAD".

The officer then found a young accomplice down the road with a sign painted "TIPS" and a bucket of change.

A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes.

He goes up to the guy's window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."

The man says, "Sorry officer I can't do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I'll have a really bad asthma attack."

"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample." "I can't do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I'll bleed to death."

"Well, then we need a urine sample."

"I'm sorry officer I can't do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I'll get really low blood sugar."

"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."

"I can't do that, officer."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm too drunk to do that!"