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on the back of a van
Seen on the back of a van in Rochester, New York:

Caution: Blind Man Driving

On the side of the van (after passing it to see who might be driving):

Rochester Venetian Blind Co.

you're in the desert
16 Ways of Knowing You're in the Desert
  1. You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
  2. You can say 110 degrees without fainting.
  3. You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.
  4. You can make instant sun tea.
  5. You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.
  6. The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly.
  7. You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car.
  8. You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.
  9. You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
  10. Hot water now comes out of both taps.
  11. It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets.
  12. You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
  13. You break a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. before work.
  14. No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning.
  15. Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
  16. You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
stay over one night
A hindu priest, rabbi and a lawyer were driving down the road, when the car breaks down. Fortunately finding a farmhouse nearby, the farmer informed them that he had only one spare room, and that it had only two twin beds.

They were welcome to it, but one of them had to sleep in the barn. After much discussion, the hindu volunteered to go to the barn. A few moments later, a knock on the bedroom door, and the hidu explained that there was a cow in the barn, and cows are sacred and he could not possibly sleep in the barn with a cow.

Annoyed, the rabbi volunteered. A few moments later, a knock on the door. The rabbi explained that there was a pig in the barn and that he, being very orthodox, could not possibly spend the evening in the barn with the origin of pork.

Finally the lawyer said that he would go to the barn. A few moments later there was a knock on the door. It was the cow and the pig!

on a truck's mudflaps
Seen on rear mud-flaps of a large truck

left mud-flap		right mud-flap

Passing Side		Suicide
 /|         		     |
/ ------    		------ 
 ------     		------ /
 |         		     |/
El Paso			El Cruncho
(spanish)		(spanish)

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