ROBERT SCHMIDT 07 - Funny one liners jokes

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ROBERT SCHMIDT 07
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather.  It moved to Alaska.  Now Santa Claus is missing.

I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu."  The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?"

Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle.

I took lessons in bicycle riding.  But I could only afford half of them.  Now I can ride a unicycle.

I got a calculator and now I can't add without it.  I got a spellchecker and I can't write without it anymore.  I got a blowdryer and now my hair won't dry on its own.

Get a bunch of those 3-D glasses and wear them at the same time. Use enough to get it up to a good, say, 10 or 12-D.

I heard that in relativity theory space and time are the same thing.  Einstein discovered this when he kept showing up three miles late for his meetings.

Called a blind date to set up a meeting at a restaurant.  I said, "I'll be the one in the leather jacket."  She said, "I'll be the one drinking sake."  Turned out it was one of those biker-sushi places.  We never met.

Wrote my own communications software in LISP.  Got a phone bill for a thousand dollars.  My computer keeps calling itself.