sports jokes jokes

Jokes » sports jokes » jokes 4

sports jokes


mixed football jokes
 
 
A burglary was recently committed at West Ham's ground and the entire contents of the trophy room were stolen. The police are looking for a man with a claret & blue carpet.

The seven dwarves are down in the mines when there is a cave-in. Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them. In the distance a voice shouts out "Charlton are good enough to win the European Cup." Snow White says "Well at least Dopey's alive!"

Q: How does Stan Collymore change a lightbulb?
A: He holds it in the air, and the world revolves around him

The Fire brigade phones George Graham in the early hours of Sunday morning.

"Mr Graham sir, White Hart Lane is on fire!"

"The cups man! Save the cups!" cries George.

"Uh, the fire hasn't spread to the canteen yet, sir."

Apparently, Harry Redknapp offered to send the West Ham squad on an expenses paid holiday to Florida but they said they'd rather go to Blackpool so they could see what it's like to ride on an open-top bus.

Big Ron was caught speeding on his way to the City Ground today.
"I'll do anything for 3 points", he said when questioned.

The Nottingham Forest Chairman is considering replacing Big Ron with Steve Davis. Explaining this unusual move, he said "we don't just need points now, we need snookers!"

British Rail have decided to start sponsoring Forest. BR think they are a suitable team because of their regular points failures.

top nfl complaints
 
 
Top NFL Complaints

  1. After shooting the blank gun to end the half, the Dallas Cowboy players start shooting back with live ammunition.

  2. Calling "heads or tails" but never getting any. . . "head" or "tail".

  3. Players get "the wave". . . refs get "the finger".

  4. Anyone who makes a call against the Detroit Lions risks pissing off their last remaining fan.

  5. With Reggie White retired, the penalty for "Illegal use of a racial slur" is meaningless.

  6. Just when we thought it was safe to be an NFL Ref, we have to go back to frickin' CLEVELAND!!!

  7. Thanks to instant replay, picking nose during a game is twice as risky.

  8. Everyone else gets to wear their Autumn colors, but for me it's black and white week after week after week!

  9. Don King only bribes boxing judges.

  10. Official rule books not made in Braille.

  11. I'm the one that everybody wants to kill, so where's MY helmet and pads?!

she's new to football
 
 
A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. Afterward he asked her how she liked the game.

"I liked it, but I couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents," she said.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Well, everyone kept yelling, 'Get the quarter back!'"

an extremely loyal fan
 
 
There was a Packers fan with a really crappy seat at Lambeau. Looking with his binoculars, he spotted an empty seat on the 50-yard line. Thinking to himself "what a waste" he made his way down to the empty seat.

When he arrived at the seat, he asked the man sitting next to it, "Is this seat taken?" The man replied, "This was my wife's seat. She passed away. She was a big Packers fan." The other man replied,"I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. May I ask why you didn't give the ticket to a friend or a relative?"

The man replied, "They're all at the funeral."


Page 5 of 10     «« Previous | Next »»