**the math one-liners**

If parallel lines meet at infinity - infinity must be a very noisy place with all those lines crashing together!

Maths Teacher: Now suppose the number of sheep is x...

Student: Yes sir, but what happens if the number of sheep is not x?

Zenophobia: the irrational fear of convergent sequences.

Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules. Mathematics is a game with rules and no objectives.

If I had only one day left to live, I would live it in my statistics class: it would seem so much longer.

**answering machine**

**purchasing the shoes**

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