school collection 14
Father: I hear you skipped school to play football
Son: No I didn't, and I have the fish to prove it!
Teacher: When was Rome built?
Pupil: At night.
Teacher: Why did you say that?
Pupil: Because my Dad always says that Rome wasn't built in a day!
What did the Sheriff of Nottingham say when Robin fired at him?
That was an arrow escape!
A history joke
What did the ghost of Queen Elizabeth say as it floated into the terrified woman's bedroom?
Don't worry, I'm just passing through!
Pupil: My teacher was mad with me because I didn't know where the Rockies were.
Mother: Well next time remember where you put things!
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Son: No I didn't, and I have the fish to prove it!
Teacher: When was Rome built?
Pupil: At night.
Teacher: Why did you say that?
Pupil: Because my Dad always says that Rome wasn't built in a day!
What did the Sheriff of Nottingham say when Robin fired at him?
That was an arrow escape!
A history joke
What did the ghost of Queen Elizabeth say as it floated into the terrified woman's bedroom?
Don't worry, I'm just passing through!
Pupil: My teacher was mad with me because I didn't know where the Rockies were.
Mother: Well next time remember where you put things!
school collection 20
Teacher: Where is the English Channel?
Pupil: I don't know, my TV doesn't pick it up
Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week, what have you got to say about that?
Pupil: Thank heavens it's Friday!
Teacher: Didn't you hear me call you?
Pupil: But you said not to answer you back!
What tables don't you have to learn?
Dinner tables!
Why was the headmaster worried?
Because there were too many rulers in school!
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Pupil: I don't know, my TV doesn't pick it up
Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week, what have you got to say about that?
Pupil: Thank heavens it's Friday!
Teacher: Didn't you hear me call you?
Pupil: But you said not to answer you back!
What tables don't you have to learn?
Dinner tables!
Why was the headmaster worried?
Because there were too many rulers in school!
school collection 24
What was that?
Went down in history!
Do you know the 20th President of the United States?
No, we were never introduced!
A math joke
Teacher, I can't solve this problem.
Any five year old should be able to solve this one.
No wonder I can't do it then, I'm nearly ten!
Teacher: Why can't you ever answer any of my questions?
Pupil: Well if I could there wouldn't be much point in me being here!
What did the computer do at lunchtime?
Had a byte!
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Went down in history!
Do you know the 20th President of the United States?
No, we were never introduced!
A math joke
Teacher, I can't solve this problem.
Any five year old should be able to solve this one.
No wonder I can't do it then, I'm nearly ten!
Teacher: Why can't you ever answer any of my questions?
Pupil: Well if I could there wouldn't be much point in me being here!
What did the computer do at lunchtime?
Had a byte!
school collection 30
Pupil: I don't think I deserved zero on this test!
Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you!
What did Noah do for a job?
He was an arkitecht!
What's that fly doing in my gravy?
Looks like the breast stroke!
Teacher: When do astronauts eat?
Pupil: At launch time!
Father: You were absent on the day of the test?
Son: No but the boy who sits next to me was!
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Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you!
What did Noah do for a job?
He was an arkitecht!
What's that fly doing in my gravy?
Looks like the breast stroke!
Teacher: When do astronauts eat?
Pupil: At launch time!
Father: You were absent on the day of the test?
Son: No but the boy who sits next to me was!
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