school collection 26
Mother: Why did you just swallow the money I gave you?
Son: Well you did say it was my lunch money!
What's a mushroom?
The place they store the school food!
Teacher: I said to draw a cow eating some grass but you've only drawn the cow?
Pupil: Yes, the cow ate all the grass!
My teacher reminds me of history
She's always repeating herself!
A math joke
Teacher: Did your parents help you with these homework problems?
Pupil: No I got them all wrong by myself!
Son: Well you did say it was my lunch money!
What's a mushroom?
The place they store the school food!
Teacher: I said to draw a cow eating some grass but you've only drawn the cow?
Pupil: Yes, the cow ate all the grass!
My teacher reminds me of history
She's always repeating herself!
A math joke
Teacher: Did your parents help you with these homework problems?
Pupil: No I got them all wrong by myself!
school collection 06
What's black and white all over and difficult?
An exam paper!
A history joke
Why aren't you doing very well in history?
Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I was born!
A history joke
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8th!
A history joke
The Spanish explorers went round the world in a galleon.
How many galleons did the get to the mile!
A history joke
What kind of lighting did Noah use for the ark?
Floodlights!
An exam paper!
A history joke
Why aren't you doing very well in history?
Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I was born!
A history joke
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8th!
A history joke
The Spanish explorers went round the world in a galleon.
How many galleons did the get to the mile!
A history joke
What kind of lighting did Noah use for the ark?
Floodlights!
school collection 25
Little Monster: I hate my teacher.
Mother Monster: Well just eat your salad up then dear!
"What's the matter with your dinner?"
"Can you describe it for me please in case I need to tell my doctor later what I've eaten!"
Abraham Lincoln had a very hard childhood, he had to walk 7 miles to school everyday.
Well he should have got up earlier and caught the school bus like everyone else!
A math joke
Dad, can you help me find the lowest common denominator in this problem please?
Don't tell me that they haven't found it yet, I remember looking for it when I was a boy!
Teacher: What came after the stone age and the bronze age?
Pupil: The sausage!
Mother Monster: Well just eat your salad up then dear!
"What's the matter with your dinner?"
"Can you describe it for me please in case I need to tell my doctor later what I've eaten!"
Abraham Lincoln had a very hard childhood, he had to walk 7 miles to school everyday.
Well he should have got up earlier and caught the school bus like everyone else!
A math joke
Dad, can you help me find the lowest common denominator in this problem please?
Don't tell me that they haven't found it yet, I remember looking for it when I was a boy!
Teacher: What came after the stone age and the bronze age?
Pupil: The sausage!
school collection 15
What did Noah do while spending time on the ark?
Fished, but he didn't catch much. He only had two worms!
Mother: What was the first thing you learned in class?
Daughter: How to talk without moving my lips!
What did Caesar say to Cleopatra?
Toga-ether we can rule the world!
Teacher: What's big and yellow and comes in the morning to brighten a mothers day?
Pupil: The school bus!
What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had?
The lion closed its mouth to see how many heads the slave had!
Fished, but he didn't catch much. He only had two worms!
Mother: What was the first thing you learned in class?
Daughter: How to talk without moving my lips!
What did Caesar say to Cleopatra?
Toga-ether we can rule the world!
Teacher: What's big and yellow and comes in the morning to brighten a mothers day?
Pupil: The school bus!
What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had?
The lion closed its mouth to see how many heads the slave had!
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