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silly jokes


silly collection 05
 
 
I'd tell you another joke about a pencil.
But it doesn't have any point!

Why do idiots eat biscuits?
Because they're crackers!

What was the gangsters last words?
Who put that violin in my violin case!

Did you hear about the little boy that they named after his father?
They called him dad!

What has forty feet and sings?
The school choir!

Did you hear about the stupid Kamikaze pilot?
He flew 57 missions!

Why does a flamingo lift up one leg?
Because if he lifted up both legs it would fall over!

silly collection 13
 
 
What did the tie say to the hat?
You go on ahead and I'll hang around!

What did the picture say to the wall?
I've got you covered!

What is the best thing to take into the desert?
A thirst aid kit!

Who was the first underwater spy?
James Pond!

What is hairy and coughs?
A coconut with a cold!

What do you call a foreign body in a chip pan?
An Unidentified Frying Object!

Why did the lazy man want a job in a bakery?
So he could loaf around!

silly collection 24
 
 
Why did the cowboy die with his boots on?
Because he didn't want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket!

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?
Missile toe!

Do you have any invisible ink?
Certainly sir. What colour?
How is business going?
I'm looking for a new cashier
But you only had a new one last week
Yes, that's the one I'm looking for!

Where do hamsters come?
Hampsterdam!

What kind of biscuit would you find at the south pole?
A penguin!

Why is the time in the USA behind that of England?
Because England was discovered before the USA!

silly collection 25
 
 
What is posthumous work?
Something written by someone after they are dead!

What is the most slippery country in the world?
Greece!

What is the strongest bird?
A crane!

What is the smelliest city in America?
Phew York!

What did the fireman's wife get for Christmas?
A ladder in her stocking!

Who was the best actor in the bible?
Samson, he brought the house down!

What cake wanted to rule the world?
Atilla the Bun!


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