how you earned it
A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money.
The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel."
"I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents."
"The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37."
"Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars."
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The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel."
"I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents."
"The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37."
"Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars."
professions 03
OLD CANNERS never die, they are preserved
OLD CARS never die, they just get run into the ground
OLD CASHIERS never die, they just check out
OLD CHAUFFEURS never die, they just lose their drive
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just do it inorganically
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just fail to react
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just lose their refluxes
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just reach equilibrium
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just smell that way
OLD CLEANING PEOPLE never die, they just kick the bucket
OLD COMPOSERS never die, they just decompose
OLD COMPUTER PEOPLE never die, they just lose their memory
OLD COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS never die, they just byte the dust
OLD COOKS never die, they just get deranged
OLD COURIERS never die, they just keep on EXPRESSing it!
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OLD CARS never die, they just get run into the ground
OLD CASHIERS never die, they just check out
OLD CHAUFFEURS never die, they just lose their drive
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just do it inorganically
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just fail to react
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just lose their refluxes
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just reach equilibrium
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just smell that way
OLD CLEANING PEOPLE never die, they just kick the bucket
OLD COMPOSERS never die, they just decompose
OLD COMPUTER PEOPLE never die, they just lose their memory
OLD COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS never die, they just byte the dust
OLD COOKS never die, they just get deranged
OLD COURIERS never die, they just keep on EXPRESSing it!
uncovering a scam
The Senate is investigating deceptive sweepstakes practices. These companies target the elderly and make them think they will receive a bunch of money, but in reality they never see any of it.
The most popular of these scams is called Social Security.
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The most popular of these scams is called Social Security.
she is angry at you
Worried because they hadn't heard anything for days from the widow in the neighboring apartment, Mrs. Silver said to her son, "Timmy, would you go next door and see how old Mrs. Kirkland is?"
A few minutes later, Timmy returned.
"Well," asked Mrs. Silver, "is she all right?"
"She's fine, except that she's angry at you."
"At me?" the woman exclaimed. "Whatever for?"
"She said 'It's none of your business how old she is,'" snickered Timmy.
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A few minutes later, Timmy returned.
"Well," asked Mrs. Silver, "is she all right?"
"She's fine, except that she's angry at you."
"At me?" the woman exclaimed. "Whatever for?"
"She said 'It's none of your business how old she is,'" snickered Timmy.
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