old age jokes jokes

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old age jokes


i have bad news
 
 
The doctor tells his patient: "Well I have good news and bad news..."

The patient says, "Lay it on me Doc. What's the bad news?"

"You have Alzheimer's disease."

"Good heavens! What's the good news?"

"You can go home and forget about it!"

professions 05
 
 
OLD ELECTRICIANS never die, they just do it until it Hz

OLD ELECTRICIANS never die, they just lose contact

OLD ENERGIZER BUNNIES never die, they go on, and on, and on...

OLD ENGINEERS never die, they just lose their bearings

OLD ENGLISH MAJORS do it with Strunk and White

OLD ENVIRONMENTALISTS never die, they are just recycled

OLD ESKIMOES never die, they just get cold feet

OLD ESKIMOES never die, they just go cold

OLD EXORCISTS never die, they just give up the ghost

OLD FARMERS never die, they just go to seed

OLD FARMERS never die, they just spade away

OLD FATHERS never die, they just become grandfathers

OLD FISHERMEN never die, their rods just go limp

OLD FISHERMEN never die, they just get reel tired

OLD FISHERMEN never die, they just smell that way

professions 06
 
 
OLD FOOTBALL PLAYERS never die, they just go to the end zone

OLD FOOTBALLERS never die, they just kick the bucket

OLD FORESTERS never die, they just pine away

OLD FRIDGE REPAIRMEN never die, they just blow their cool

OLD FROGS never die, they just croak

OLD FRUIT never die, it just pear-ishes

OLD GARAGEMEN never die, they just retire

OLD GEOLOGISTS never die, they just recrystalize

OLD GHOST TOWNS never die, they become desolate

OLD GOLFERS never die, they just lose their drive

OLD GRAPHIC ARTISTS never die, they just de-rez

OLD GYMNASTS never die, they just take longer to mount

OLD HAMS never die, they just get grounded

OLD HARDWARE ENGINEERS never die, they just cache in their chips

OLD HELSINKI TOURISTS never die, they just vanish into Finn Air

recently seen
 
 
Recently seen on a card...

Outside: We dont feel sorry for you blowing all those candles, what about us...

Inside: ... We had to stay up all night lighting them!


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