business one-liners 50
Approval Seeker's Law: Those whose approval you seek the most give you the least. - Washington writer Rozanne Weissman
The Aquinas Axiom: What the gods get away with, the cows don't.
Army Axiom: Any order that can be misunderstood has been misunderstood.
Arnold's Laws of Documentation: (1) If it should exist, it doesn't. (2) If it does exist, it's out of date. (3) Only documentation for useless programs transcends the first two laws.
Astrology Laws: It's always the wrong time of the month. - Rozanne Weissman
Avery's Rule of Three: Trouble strikes in series of threes, but when working around the house the next job after a series of three is not the fourth job - it's the start of a brand new series of three.
Baer's Quartet: What's good politics is bad economics; what's bad politics is good economics; what's good economics is bad politics; what's bad economics is good politics. - Eugene Baer (Baer also allows that it can be restated somewhat more compactly as "What's good politics is bad economics and vice versa, vice versa.")
Bagdikian's Observation: Trying to be a first-rate reporter on the average American newspaper is like trying to play Bach's "St. Matthew Passion" on a ukelele.
Baker's First Law of Federal Geometry: A block grant is a solid mass of money surrounded on all sides by governors.
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The Aquinas Axiom: What the gods get away with, the cows don't.
Army Axiom: Any order that can be misunderstood has been misunderstood.
Arnold's Laws of Documentation: (1) If it should exist, it doesn't. (2) If it does exist, it's out of date. (3) Only documentation for useless programs transcends the first two laws.
Astrology Laws: It's always the wrong time of the month. - Rozanne Weissman
Avery's Rule of Three: Trouble strikes in series of threes, but when working around the house the next job after a series of three is not the fourth job - it's the start of a brand new series of three.
Baer's Quartet: What's good politics is bad economics; what's bad politics is good economics; what's good economics is bad politics; what's bad economics is good politics. - Eugene Baer (Baer also allows that it can be restated somewhat more compactly as "What's good politics is bad economics and vice versa, vice versa.")
Bagdikian's Observation: Trying to be a first-rate reporter on the average American newspaper is like trying to play Bach's "St. Matthew Passion" on a ukelele.
Baker's First Law of Federal Geometry: A block grant is a solid mass of money surrounded on all sides by governors.
business one-liners 108
Hugh Downs' Four Rules for Investigating the Universe: Rule 1 - When confronted with an apparent infinite or infinitely repeating pattern, expect some variant that keeps it from being infinite. Rule 2 - When all investigation supports Rule 1, look for a situation which violates it. Rule 3 - Be prepared for an infinite oscillation between Rules 1 and 2. Rule 4 - Apply Rule 1.
Drew's Law of Highway Biology: The first bug to hit a clean windshield lands directly in front of your eyes.
Ducharme's Axiom: If you view your problem closely enough you will recognize yourself as part of the problem.
Ducharme's Precept: Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
Emersons' Law of Contrariness: Our chief want in life is somebody who shall make us do what we can. Having found them, we shall then hate them for it.
Estridge's Law: No matter how large and standardized the marketplace is, IBM can redefine it.
Fett's Law: Never replicate a successful experiment.
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Drew's Law of Highway Biology: The first bug to hit a clean windshield lands directly in front of your eyes.
Ducharme's Axiom: If you view your problem closely enough you will recognize yourself as part of the problem.
Ducharme's Precept: Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
Emersons' Law of Contrariness: Our chief want in life is somebody who shall make us do what we can. Having found them, we shall then hate them for it.
Estridge's Law: No matter how large and standardized the marketplace is, IBM can redefine it.
Fett's Law: Never replicate a successful experiment.
business one-liners 42
The obscure we see eventually; the completely apparent takes a little longer.
The one item you want is never the one on sale.
The one thing that money can not buy is poverty.
The one who does the least work will get the most credit.
The one who says it can't be done should never interrupt the one doing it.
The one you want is never the one on sale.
The only important information in a hierarchy is who knows what.
The only knowledge that can hurt you is the knowledge you don't have.
The only real errors are human errors.
The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it is unfamiliar territory.
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The one item you want is never the one on sale.
The one thing that money can not buy is poverty.
The one who does the least work will get the most credit.
The one who says it can't be done should never interrupt the one doing it.
The one you want is never the one on sale.
The only important information in a hierarchy is who knows what.
The only knowledge that can hurt you is the knowledge you don't have.
The only real errors are human errors.
The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it is unfamiliar territory.
business one-liners 80
It's Not My Job!
It's not hard to meet expenses; they are everywhere.
It's not how good your work is, it's how well you explain it.
It's not the work that gets me down, it's the coffee breaks.
It's out of my control.
Job placement: Telling your boss what he can do with your job.
Join in the new game that's sweeping the country. It's called "Bureaucracy". Everybody stands in a circle. The first person to do anything loses.
Junk mail arrives the day it was sent.
Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.
Just about the time when your income gets to the point where food prices don't matter, calories do.
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It's not hard to meet expenses; they are everywhere.
It's not how good your work is, it's how well you explain it.
It's not the work that gets me down, it's the coffee breaks.
It's out of my control.
Job placement: Telling your boss what he can do with your job.
Join in the new game that's sweeping the country. It's called "Bureaucracy". Everybody stands in a circle. The first person to do anything loses.
Junk mail arrives the day it was sent.
Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.
Just about the time when your income gets to the point where food prices don't matter, calories do.
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