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11851 - Answering message 50 - funny answering machine messages
Vancouver Coast Guard, may I help you. (Caller thinks that he/she accidentally dialed long distance.
Vancouver Coast Guard, may I help you. (Caller thinks that he/she accidentally dialed long distance.
11852 - Answering message 52 - funny answering machine messages
"I'm Morley Safer." "I'm Harry Reasoner." "And I'm Fred." "We're not home; leave a message."
"I'm Morley Safer." "I'm Harry Reasoner." "And I'm Fred." "We're not home; leave a message."
11853 - Answering message 54 - funny answering machine messages
Imitating Mr. Rogers: Hello. I'm in the Neighborhood of Make Believe right no... [read complete]
Imitating Mr. Rogers: Hello. I'm in the Neighborhood of Make Believe right no... [read complete]
11854 - Answering message 56 - funny answering machine messages
Hello, this is Rip van Winkle. I'm not awake to take your call right now. Ple... [read complete]
Hello, this is Rip van Winkle. I'm not awake to take your call right now. Ple... [read complete]
11855 - Answering message 58 - funny answering machine messages
E'llo. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Leave your name and number, and prepare to die.
E'llo. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Leave your name and number, and prepare to die.
11856 - Answering message 39 - funny answering machine messages
Hello. This is Nonoxynol-9, the personal and private telephone number of Mikh... [read complete]
Hello. This is Nonoxynol-9, the personal and private telephone number of Mikh... [read complete]
11857 - Answering message 41 - funny answering machine messages
US National Anthem; Ronald Reagan voice: Uhh, hello... I'm, uhhh, ohhhhhh... ... [read complete]
US National Anthem; Ronald Reagan voice: Uhh, hello... I'm, uhhh, ohhhhhh... ... [read complete]
11858 - Answering message 43 - funny answering machine messages
Militaristic mechanical voice: FOXTROT-LIMA-ALPHA-SIERRA-HOTEL. KEY-DESTRUCT-... [read complete]
Militaristic mechanical voice: FOXTROT-LIMA-ALPHA-SIERRA-HOTEL. KEY-DESTRUCT-... [read complete]
11859 - Answering message 45 - funny answering machine messages
You just dialed into the North American Air Defense Contract Center. Stand by... [read complete]
You just dialed into the North American Air Defense Contract Center. Stand by... [read complete]
11860 - Answering message 47 - funny answering machine messages
Clint Eastwood voice: Go ahead, make my day. Leave a message.
Clint Eastwood voice: Go ahead, make my day. Leave a message.
11861 - Answering message 49 - funny answering machine messages
In Joe Friday voice: This is Constable Augie of the Canadian Security and Int... [read complete]
In Joe Friday voice: This is Constable Augie of the Canadian Security and Int... [read complete]
11862 - Answering message 51 - funny answering machine messages
Annoying flute music in background: Good day, Jim. Your contact, Linda, is no... [read complete]
Annoying flute music in background: Good day, Jim. Your contact, Linda, is no... [read complete]
11863 - Answering message 53 - funny answering machine messages
This is Walter Cronkite. Bren's not here right now. He's out on a date. The i... [read complete]
This is Walter Cronkite. Bren's not here right now. He's out on a date. The i... [read complete]
11864 - Answering message 55 - funny answering machine messages
English accent: Hello, you've reached the phone of Monty Python. I can't come... [read complete]
English accent: Hello, you've reached the phone of Monty Python. I can't come... [read complete]
11865 - Answering message 57 - funny answering machine messages
Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.
Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.
11866 - Answering message 59 - funny answering machine messages
Hello, you have reached the DOE, that is, the Department Of Enemies. Rick Bur... [read complete]
Hello, you have reached the DOE, that is, the Department Of Enemies. Rick Bur... [read complete]
11867 - Answering message 61 - funny answering machine messages
Thank you for calling the Confessional Hotline. Father Durway's not here righ... [read complete]
Thank you for calling the Confessional Hotline. Father Durway's not here righ... [read complete]
11868 - Answering message 63 - funny answering machine messages
Thank you for calling the Satanic Hotline. All of our operators are busy at t... [read complete]
Thank you for calling the Satanic Hotline. All of our operators are busy at t... [read complete]
11869 - Answering message 65 - funny answering machine messages
You have reached the Suicide Prevention Hotline. All our lines are busy now, ... [read complete]
You have reached the Suicide Prevention Hotline. All our lines are busy now, ... [read complete]
11870 - Answering message 67 - funny answering machine messages
Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, please p... [read complete]
Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, please p... [read complete]
11871 - Answering message 69 - funny answering machine messages
Hi! This is Mary. I'm afflicted with lysdexic procrastination. Please leave y... [read complete]
Hi! This is Mary. I'm afflicted with lysdexic procrastination. Please leave y... [read complete]
11872 - Answering message 71 - funny answering machine messages
Theme music from Peter Gunn: My name is David. What people call me is somethi... [read complete]
Theme music from Peter Gunn: My name is David. What people call me is somethi... [read complete]
11873 - Answering message 73 - funny answering machine messages
Demented, screechy voice; occasional background screams: Hello. Thank you for... [read complete]
Demented, screechy voice; occasional background screams: Hello. Thank you for... [read complete]
11874 - Answering message 75 - funny answering machine messages
Comrades! Southwestern Front Headquarters is pleased to learn that your unit ... [read complete]
Comrades! Southwestern Front Headquarters is pleased to learn that your unit ... [read complete]
11875 - Answering message 77 - funny answering machine messages
Hello, this is the Yardmaster's Office, Valsetz and Siletz railroad (an actua... [read complete]
Hello, this is the Yardmaster's Office, Valsetz and Siletz railroad (an actua... [read complete]
11876 - Answering message 79 - funny answering machine messages
Hello! This is 1-800-PRESLEY. Yes! 1-800-PRESLEY! They say the King died 10 y... [read complete]
Hello! This is 1-800-PRESLEY. Yes! 1-800-PRESLEY! They say the King died 10 y... [read complete]
11877 - Answering message 81 - funny answering machine messages
Hello, this is KVKE, you're on the air.
Hello, this is KVKE, you're on the air.
11878 - Answering message 83 - funny answering machine messages
Next on Public Radio 91 we'll be hearing music of Antonin Dvorak. This is the Beep Serenade in C-Sharp Minor, Opus 72...
Next on Public Radio 91 we'll be hearing music of Antonin Dvorak. This is the Beep Serenade in C-Sharp Minor, Opus 72...
11879 - Answering message 85 - funny answering machine messages
Thanks for calling Dial-A-Shrink. I can't come to the phone right now, so aft... [read complete]
Thanks for calling Dial-A-Shrink. I can't come to the phone right now, so aft... [read complete]
11880 - Answering message 60 - funny answering machine messages
This is the Literacy Self Test Hotline. After the tone, leave your name and n... [read complete]
This is the Literacy Self Test Hotline. After the tone, leave your name and n... [read complete]
11881 - Answering message 62 - funny answering machine messages
Gregorian chants in background; serene voice: Hello, Brother or Sister. You h... [read complete]
Gregorian chants in background; serene voice: Hello, Brother or Sister. You h... [read complete]
11882 - Answering message 64 - funny answering machine messages
To scare off annoying liberals: Hello, and thank you for calling the Bush in ... [read complete]
To scare off annoying liberals: Hello, and thank you for calling the Bush in ... [read complete]
11883 - Answering message 66 - funny answering machine messages
Thank you for calling 911. All of our operators are currently busy. Please st... [read complete]
Thank you for calling 911. All of our operators are currently busy. Please st... [read complete]
11884 - Answering message 68 - funny answering machine messages
You have reached the Des Moines chapter of the Iowa Procrastination Society. ... [read complete]
You have reached the Des Moines chapter of the Iowa Procrastination Society. ... [read complete]
11885 - Answering message 70 - funny answering machine messages
Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know how you... [read complete]
Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know how you... [read complete]
11886 - Answering message 72 - funny answering machine messages
Thank you for calling Uncle Tom's Mortuary and Delicatessen. You stab 'em and... [read complete]
Thank you for calling Uncle Tom's Mortuary and Delicatessen. You stab 'em and... [read complete]
11887 - Answering message 74 - funny answering machine messages
Stoned, slow voice: Hey brother, you have reached the Narcotics Information H... [read complete]
Stoned, slow voice: Hey brother, you have reached the Narcotics Information H... [read complete]
11888 - Answering message 76 - funny answering machine messages
French monologue in the background: Around the world today, millions still sp... [read complete]
French monologue in the background: Around the world today, millions still sp... [read complete]
11889 - Answering message 78 - funny answering machine messages
Thank you for phoning the Save the Sasquatch Hotline. Our operators do not ex... [read complete]
Thank you for phoning the Save the Sasquatch Hotline. Our operators do not ex... [read complete]
11890 - Answering message 80 - funny answering machine messages
Hi, dudes, this is 229-3053, the Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles' secret undergro... [read complete]
Hi, dudes, this is 229-3053, the Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles' secret undergro... [read complete]
11891 - Answering message 82 - funny answering machine messages
Hello, you're caller number nine! You are listening to 91.5 FM, KXQK. This is... [read complete]
Hello, you're caller number nine! You are listening to 91.5 FM, KXQK. This is... [read complete]
11892 - Answering message 84 - funny answering machine messages
This is a test. This is a test of the Answering Machine Broadcast System. This is only a test.
This is a test. This is a test of the Answering Machine Broadcast System. This is only a test.
11893 - Answering message 86 - funny answering machine messages
Welcome to the Afterlife Voice Mail System. If you are trying to reach Heaven... [read complete]
Welcome to the Afterlife Voice Mail System. If you are trying to reach Heaven... [read complete]
11894 - Answering message 87 - funny answering machine messages
Operatic music like Rossini's "Stabbat Matter": Hi, you've reached Hell. (Scr... [read complete]
Operatic music like Rossini's "Stabbat Matter": Hi, you've reached Hell. (Scr... [read complete]
11895 - Answering message 89 - funny answering machine messages
Madonna's "Justify My Love"; sultry voice: Wanting... Waiting... For you, To justify your call...
Madonna's "Justify My Love"; sultry voice: Wanting... Waiting... For you, To justify your call...
11896 - Answering message 91 - funny answering machine messages
(Guns & Roses' "Civil War":) What we've got here is... Failure to communicate... [read complete]
(Guns & Roses' "Civil War":) What we've got here is... Failure to communicate... [read complete]
11897 - Answering message 93 - funny answering machine messages
Cheers TV show theme song, "Where Everybody Knows your Name": Sometimes you m... [read complete]
Cheers TV show theme song, "Where Everybody Knows your Name": Sometimes you m... [read complete]
11898 - Answering message 95 - funny answering machine messages
Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit": Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello... [read complete]
Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit": Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello... [read complete]
11899 - Answering message 97 - funny answering machine messages
"Camptown Races": I can't come to the telephone; doo-dah, doo-dah. Leave your... [read complete]
"Camptown Races": I can't come to the telephone; doo-dah, doo-dah. Leave your... [read complete]
11900 - Answering message 99 - funny answering machine messages
Beethoven's Fifth: Nobody's home. Why did you phone? Please leave your messag... [read complete]
Page 238 of 291Beethoven's Fifth: Nobody's home. Why did you phone? Please leave your messag... [read complete]
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