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"In the back of your truck there's a shotgun. Shoot the pig in the head and when it stops wriggling you can pull it out and throw it in a bush."
The farm worker agrees and signs off. About 10 minutes later he radios back. "Boss I did what you said, I shot the pig and dragged it out and threw it in a bush."
"So what's the problem now?" his Boss snapped.
"The blue light on his bike is still flashing!"
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'Yes.'
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He saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.
Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, 'Can I help you?'
'Yeah, I've come to activate your phone lines.'
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“Fifty dollars for three questions, ” replied the lawyer.
“Isn't that awfully steep?” asked the man.
“Yes,” the lawyer replied, “and what was your third question?”
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