business one-liners 96
Two monologues do not make a dialogue.
Two rules to success in life: 1. Don't tell people everything you know.
Two wrongs are only the beginning.
Unemployment helps stretch your coffee break.
Unless absolutely essential, borrowing to buy a depreciating asset is dumb.
Unless the results are known in advance, funding agencies will reject the proposal.
Urgency varies inversely with importance.
Usefulness is inversely proportional to its reputation for being useful.
Virtue is its own punishment.
Wasting time is an important part of living.
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Two rules to success in life: 1. Don't tell people everything you know.
Two wrongs are only the beginning.
Unemployment helps stretch your coffee break.
Unless absolutely essential, borrowing to buy a depreciating asset is dumb.
Unless the results are known in advance, funding agencies will reject the proposal.
Urgency varies inversely with importance.
Usefulness is inversely proportional to its reputation for being useful.
Virtue is its own punishment.
Wasting time is an important part of living.
business one-liners 72
If you have something to do, and you put it off long enough, chances are someone else will do it for you.
If you have to ask, you are not entitled to know.
If you just try long enough and hard enough, you can always manage to boot yourself in the posterior.
If you keep anything long enough, you can throw it away.
If you keep saying things are going to be bad, you have a chance of being a prophet.
If you live in a country run by committee, be on the committee.
If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; but if you really make them think they'll hate you.
If you mess with a thing long enough, it will break.
If you plan to leave your mark in the sands of time, you better wear work shoes.
If you put it off long enough, it might go away.
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If you have to ask, you are not entitled to know.
If you just try long enough and hard enough, you can always manage to boot yourself in the posterior.
If you keep anything long enough, you can throw it away.
If you keep saying things are going to be bad, you have a chance of being a prophet.
If you live in a country run by committee, be on the committee.
If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; but if you really make them think they'll hate you.
If you mess with a thing long enough, it will break.
If you plan to leave your mark in the sands of time, you better wear work shoes.
If you put it off long enough, it might go away.
business one-liners 75
In every work of genius we recognize our rejected thoughts.
In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it.
In spite of all evidence to the contrary, the entire universe is composed of only two basic substances: magic and lies.
In the fight between you and the world, back the world.
Incompetence is a double-edged banana.
Influence is like a savings account. The less you use it, the more you've got. - Andrew Young, American politician
Inspiration and perspiration are related by more than rhyme.
Intelligence is a tool to be used towards a goal, and goals are not always chosen intelligently. - Larry Niven 'Protector'
Interchangable parts won't.
Incompetence knows no barriers of time or place.
It may be that your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
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In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it.
In spite of all evidence to the contrary, the entire universe is composed of only two basic substances: magic and lies.
In the fight between you and the world, back the world.
Incompetence is a double-edged banana.
Influence is like a savings account. The less you use it, the more you've got. - Andrew Young, American politician
Inspiration and perspiration are related by more than rhyme.
Intelligence is a tool to be used towards a goal, and goals are not always chosen intelligently. - Larry Niven 'Protector'
Interchangable parts won't.
Incompetence knows no barriers of time or place.
It may be that your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
business one-liners 78
It is incredible how much intelligence is used in this world to prove nonsense.
It is later than you think.
It is morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.
It is not enough to tell me you worked hard to get your gold. The devil works hard too.
It is not how someone measures up. It is how they measure you.
It is not sufficient to be a success; it is also necessary for your friends to be failures.
It is not true that life is one thing after another, it's one stupid thing over and over.
It is okay to be ignorant in some areas, but some people abuse the privilege.
It is the dead wood that holds up the tree.
It is when you trip over your own shoes that you start picking up shoes.
It isn't that they can't see the solution, it's that they can't see the problem.
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It is later than you think.
It is morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.
It is not enough to tell me you worked hard to get your gold. The devil works hard too.
It is not how someone measures up. It is how they measure you.
It is not sufficient to be a success; it is also necessary for your friends to be failures.
It is not true that life is one thing after another, it's one stupid thing over and over.
It is okay to be ignorant in some areas, but some people abuse the privilege.
It is the dead wood that holds up the tree.
It is when you trip over your own shoes that you start picking up shoes.
It isn't that they can't see the solution, it's that they can't see the problem.
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