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the cesium song 10
 
 
Cesium (All through the Night)
(Tune, Fever)

(1)
Never know how much I need you,
Never know how much I'd dare,
When I mix you up with water,
I get a heat that's hard to bear.

I need my Cesium!
Burnin' brightly,
Cesium to give me light.
Cesium --
In the morning,
Cesium all through the night.

(2)
Sun lights up the daytime.
Moon lights up the night.
Cesium lights up heaven above,
With a brilliant sky-blue light.

I need my Cesium!
Burnin' hotly.
Cesium shinin' so bright.
Cesium --
In the morning,
Cesium to make me feel right.

(Coda)
Everybody,
Needs some Cesium,
Cesium to give 'em that glow.
Cesium --
Add some water,
Get a fire hot as down below!

(3)
Romeo, he had Cesium,
Cool water Juliette.
When they mixed it up together,
Things got as hot as they can get!

They needed Cesium!
Flamin' madly.
Cesium burnin' so blue.
Cesium --
Shared between them.
Cesium to make their love true.

(4)
Come to the end of my story.
Got to the point that I made.
Cesium's the stuff to heat you up,
And you ain't gonna find no shade!

You'll need cesium!
As you sizzle.
Cesium some comfort to earn.
Cesium --
It's almighty.
What a lovely way to burn!

--- Songs of Cesium #96

chemistry song 09
 
 
O Little Melting Particle
(to the tune of "O Little Town Of Bethlehem")

Para Dichloro Benzene
how do you melt so well?
The plateau of your cooling curve
is really something swell.
We think the heat of fusion
of water is so nice
Give up fourteen hundred cals per mole
and what you get is ice.

the biology song 02
 
 
To the tune of "Send in the Clowns"

So this is it,
A few bases to go,
I've tried and I've tried but the techniques's so slow.
I've poured my gels,
I've run quite a few.
Full of bubbles, they leaked and why I never knew.
But where are the clones?
I've got to have clones,
The end is so near.

Is my broth rich?
Does it look clear?
Contamination is something I always fear.
Are my plaques blue?
They shouldnt be,
No DNA left I'm down on my knees,
So give me some clones?
I've got to have clones,
The end is so near.

I've had bad preps,
There've been quite a few,
Ive tried all brands of PEG, fresh buffers, but nothing would do.
And though they say,
Solutions will keep,
In my hands they last no more than a week.
So send me some clones?
I've got to have clones,
The end is so near.

I've read my gels,
My eyes are quite sore,

There's still sequence missing, of this I am sure.
But there it is!!
Finally done.
I've conquered this fragment and now I have won.
Whats's this I hear?
A voice from the door.
My supervisor wants 10kb more!
So give me some clones,
I've got to have clones,
Or I'll be here all year!

Bill Kalionis

biologist experiment
 
 
There was this biologist who was doing some experiments with frogs. He was measuring just how far frogs could jump. So he puts a frog on a line and says "Jump frog, jump!". The frog jumps 2 feet. He writes in his lab book: 'Frog with 4 legs - jumps 2 feet'.

Next he chops off one of the legs and repeats the experiment. "Jump frog jump!" he says. The frog manages to jump 1.5 feet. So he writes in his lab book: 'Frog with 3 legs - jumps 1.5 feet'.

He chops off another and the frog only jumps 1 foot. He writes in his book: 'Frog with 2 legs jumps 1 foot'.

He continues and removes yet another leg. " Jump frog jump!" and the frog somehow jumps a half of a foot. So he writes in his lab book again: 'Frog with one leg - jumps 0.5 feet'.

Finally he chops off the last leg. He puts the frog on the line and teels it to jump. "Jump frog, jump!". The frog doesn't move. "Jump frog, jump!!!". Again the frog stays on the line. "Come on frog, jump!". But to no avail.

The biologist finally writes in his book: 'Frog with no legs - goes deaf'


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