animal jokes for kids jokes

What to you get if you cross a parrot with an elephant?
An animal that tells you everything that it remembers!

What is a baby elephant after he is five weeks old?
Six weeks old!

What did the elephant say when the man grabbed him by the tail?
This is the end of me!

Policeman: "One of your elephants has been seen chasing a man on a bicycle."
Zoo Keeper: "Nonsense, none of my elephants knows how to ride a bicycle!"

Why do the elephants have short tails?
Because they can't remember long stories!

How to you keep an elephant in suspense?
I'll tell you tomorrow!

"Dad, Mum is fighting with an enormous elephant in the garden!"
"Don't worry dear, I'm sure the elephant can look after itself!"

My elephants got no trunk?
How does it smell?
Terrible!

What do elephants sing at christmas?
Noel-ephants, Noel-ephants... Who do elephants get their christmas presents from?
Elephanta Claus!

Q: Who is the bees favorite singer?
A: Sting!

Q: Who is the bees favorite pop group?
A: The bee gees!

Q: What do you get if you cross a bee with a skunk?
A: An animal that stinks and stings!

Q: What does a queen bee do when she burps?
A: Issues a royal pardon!

Q: How does a queen bee get around her hive?
A: She's throne!

Q: What does the bee Santa Claus say?
A: Ho hum hum!

Q: Why do bees hum?
A: Because they've forgotten the words!

Q: What kind of bees hum and drop things?
A: A fumble bee!

Q: What did the bee say to the flower?
A: Hello honey!

Q: What's a bees favorite flower?
A: A bee-gonias!

Q: What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
A: They go on peck-nics!

Q: What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
A: Coop-cakes!

Q: What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
A: An eggroll!

Q: What do you call the outside of a hand gren-egg?
A: The bombshell!

Q: What does an alarm cluck say?
A: "Tick-tock-a-doodle-doo!"

Q: Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
A: Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!

Q: How long do chickens work?
A: Around the cluck!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To prove to the possum that it could be done!

Q: Why did the turkey cross the road?
A: To prove he wasn't chicken!

Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?
A: To cockadoodle dooo something!

What is a grasshopper?
An insect on a pogo stick!

What do you call a grasshopper with no legs?
A grasshover!

Why is it better to be a grasshopper than a cricket?
Because grasshoppers can play cricket but crickets can't play grasshopper!

What is green and can jump a mile in a minute?
A grasshopper with hiccups!

What is green, sooty and whistles when it rubs its back legs together?
Chimney Cricket!