animal jokes for kids jokes

Q: How is a cat laying down like a coin?
A: Because he has his head on one side and his tail on the other!

Q: Why are cars longer in the evening than they are in the morning?
A: Because they're let out in the evening and taking in in the morning!

Q: What cat purrs more than any other?
A: Purrsians!

Q: How do you spell mousetrap in just three letters?
A: C-A-T!

Q: Why happened when the cat swallowed a coin?
A: There was some money in the kitty!

Q: What does a cat call a bowl of mice?
A: A purrfect meal!

Q: Why did the cat sleep under the car?
A: Because she wanted to wake up oily!

Q: What did the cat do when he swallowed some cheese?
A: He waited by the mouse hole with baited breath!

Q: What is another way to describe a cat?
A: A heat seeking missile!

Q: Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
A: Fry-day!

Q: What happens when you drop a hand gren-egg?
A: It eggs-plodes!

Q: Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
A: He wasn't what he was cracked up to be!

Q: Is chicken soup good for your health?
A: Not if you're the chicken!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the other side!

Q: What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
A: "You scratch my beak and I'll scratch yours!"

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud and cross the road again?
A: Because he was a dirty double-crosser!

Q: Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road?
A: Because he didn't have enough guts!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the playground?
A: To get to the other slide!

Why do ducks have webbed feet?
To stamp out forest fires!

Why did the pig go to the casino?
To play the slop machine!

What is a pigs favorite ballet?
Swine Lake!

What do you get if you cross a hen with a dog?
Pooched eggs!

How do you stop a rooser crowing on Sunday?
Eat him on Saturday!

Why did the foal cough?
Because he was a little horse!

What is the opposite of cock-a doodle-doo?
Cock-a-doodle-don't!

What's the best way to keep milk from turning sour?
Leave it inside the cow!

Where do milkshakes come from?
Excited cows!

Q: What do you get if you cross a dog and a cheetah?
A: A dog that chases cars - and catches them!

Q: What happens when it rains cats and dogs?
A: You can step in a poodle!

Q: What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear?
A: A petticoat!

Q: What do you get if you cross a dog and a lion?
A: A terrified postman!

Q: What happened to the dog that ate nothing but garlic?
A: His bark was much worse than it's bite!

Q: What is a dogs favorite flower?
A: Anything in your garden!

Q: What dog wears contact lenses?
A: A cock-eyed spaniel!

Q: What's a dog favorite hobby?
A: Collecting fleas!

Q: What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?
A: That hit the spots!

Q: What do you get if you cross a Rottweiller and a hyena?
A: I don't know but I'll join in if it laughs!