elephant jokes 13
Why did the elephant walk on two feet?
To give the ants a chance!
Why do elephants have trunks?
Because they've no pockets to put things in!
Why did the elephant jump in the lake when it began to rain?
To stop getting wet!
What do elephants do in the evenings?
Watch elevision!
How to elephants talk to each other?
By 'elephone!
What did the zoo keeper say when he saw four elephants walking over the hill towards him wearing sunglasses?
Nothing, he didn't recognize them!
When do elephants have 8 feet?
When there are two of them!
What did the elephant say to the famous detective?
It's ele-mentary, my dear Sherlock!
Zoo Keeper:"I've lost one of my elephants"
Other Zoo Keeper:"Why don't you put an advert in the paper?"
Zoo Keeper:"Don't be silly, he can't read!"
What do you do if you find a blue elephant?
Try and cheer him up!
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To give the ants a chance!
Why do elephants have trunks?
Because they've no pockets to put things in!
Why did the elephant jump in the lake when it began to rain?
To stop getting wet!
What do elephants do in the evenings?
Watch elevision!
How to elephants talk to each other?
By 'elephone!
What did the zoo keeper say when he saw four elephants walking over the hill towards him wearing sunglasses?
Nothing, he didn't recognize them!
When do elephants have 8 feet?
When there are two of them!
What did the elephant say to the famous detective?
It's ele-mentary, my dear Sherlock!
Zoo Keeper:"I've lost one of my elephants"
Other Zoo Keeper:"Why don't you put an advert in the paper?"
Zoo Keeper:"Don't be silly, he can't read!"
What do you do if you find a blue elephant?
Try and cheer him up!
fish joke list 03
Where are most fish found?
Between the head and the tail!
What kind of fish will help you hear better?
A herring aid!
What do fish sing to each other?
Salmon-chanted evening!
How does an octopus go to war?
Well-armed!
Where do you find a down-and-out octopus?
On squid row!
What do you get if you cross an abbot with a trout?
Monkfish!
What bit of fish doesn't make sense?
The piece of cod that passeth all understanding!
What is dry on the outside, filled with water and blows up buildings?
A fish tank!
What was the Tsar of Russia's favorite fish?
Tsardines!
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
I wanna hold you hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!
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Between the head and the tail!
What kind of fish will help you hear better?
A herring aid!
What do fish sing to each other?
Salmon-chanted evening!
How does an octopus go to war?
Well-armed!
Where do you find a down-and-out octopus?
On squid row!
What do you get if you cross an abbot with a trout?
Monkfish!
What bit of fish doesn't make sense?
The piece of cod that passeth all understanding!
What is dry on the outside, filled with water and blows up buildings?
A fish tank!
What was the Tsar of Russia's favorite fish?
Tsardines!
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
I wanna hold you hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!
mouse joke list 02
What do angry rodents send each other at Christmas time?
Cross mouse cards!
What's the hardest part of milking a mouse?
Getting it to fit over a bucket!
Hickory hickory dock.
The mouse ran up the clock
The clock struck one
But the rest got away with minor injuries
What do you call a mouse that can pick up an elephant?
Sir!
What do mice do when they're at home?
Mousework!
What have 12 legs, six eyes, three tails and can't see?
Three blind mice!
What is small, furry and smells like bacon?
A hamster!
When should a mouse carry an umbrella?
When it's raining cats and dogs!
What's the definition of a narrow squeak?
A thin mouse!
Is there a mouse in the house?
No, but there's a moose on the loose!
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Cross mouse cards!
What's the hardest part of milking a mouse?
Getting it to fit over a bucket!
Hickory hickory dock.
The mouse ran up the clock
The clock struck one
But the rest got away with minor injuries
What do you call a mouse that can pick up an elephant?
Sir!
What do mice do when they're at home?
Mousework!
What have 12 legs, six eyes, three tails and can't see?
Three blind mice!
What is small, furry and smells like bacon?
A hamster!
When should a mouse carry an umbrella?
When it's raining cats and dogs!
What's the definition of a narrow squeak?
A thin mouse!
Is there a mouse in the house?
No, but there's a moose on the loose!
reptile joke list 05
Why did the tadpole feel lonely?
Because he was newt to the area!
Where do frogs keep their treasure?
In a croak of gold at the end of the rainbow!
Whats white on the outside, green on the inside and comes with relish and onions?
A hot frog!
What did the bus conductor ay to the frog?
Hop on!
What goes dot-dot-croak, dot-dash-croak?
Morse toad!
Whats the world weakest animal?
A toad, he croaks if you even touch him!
What kind of pole is short and floppy?
A tadpole!
What do you call a girl with a frog in her hair?
Lily!
What do Scottish toads play?
Hop-scotch!
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Because he was newt to the area!
Where do frogs keep their treasure?
In a croak of gold at the end of the rainbow!
Whats white on the outside, green on the inside and comes with relish and onions?
A hot frog!
What did the bus conductor ay to the frog?
Hop on!
What goes dot-dot-croak, dot-dash-croak?
Morse toad!
Whats the world weakest animal?
A toad, he croaks if you even touch him!
What kind of pole is short and floppy?
A tadpole!
What do you call a girl with a frog in her hair?
Lily!
What do Scottish toads play?
Hop-scotch!
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