animal jokes for kids jokes

Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?
So he could hide in the cherry tree!

What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia!

What's the difference between a sick elephant and seven days?
One is a weak one and the other one week!

What pill would you give to an elephant that can't sleep?
Trunkquilizers!

Why are elephants grey?
So you can tell them from flamingos!

Elephant Keeper: "My Elephant isn't well, do you know a good animal doctor?
" Zoo Keeper: "No, all the doctors I know are people!"

Why do elephants scratch themselves?
Because they're the only ones who know where they itch!

How does an elephant get down from a tree?
He sits on a leaf and waits till autumn!

Why did the elephant paint himself with different colours?
Because he wanted to hide in the colouring box!

How do you know that peanuts are fattening?
Have you ever seen a skinny elephant?

Have you heard about the elephant that went on a crash diet?
He wrecked three cars, a bus and two fire engines!

Why do elephants eat raw food?
Because they don't know how to cook!

Why did the elephant eat the candle?
For light refreshment!

How can you tell if there is an elephant in your dessert?
You get very lumpy ice cream!

What kind of elephants live in Antartica?
Cold ones!

How do you fit five elephants into a car?
Two in the front, two in the back and the other in the glove compartment!

How does an elephant get out of a small car?
The same way that he got in!

Why do elephants have trunks?
Because they would look silly carrying suitcases!

Why don't elephants like playing cards in the jungle?
Because of all the cheetahs!

What do you call a elephant that never washes?
A smellyphant!

Teacher: "Where would you find an elephant?"
Pupil:"You don't have to find them, they're too big to lose!"

What do you call an elephant with a carrot in each ear?
Anything you want as he can't hear you!

Teacher:"To which family does the elephant belong?"
Pupil:"I don't know, nobody I know owns one!"

How do you spell elephant?
E-l-l-e-e-f-a-n-t
"That's not how the dictionary spells it"
"You didn't ask me how the dictionary spelt it!"

Teacher: "Name six wild animals"
Pupil:"Four elephants and two lions!"

What do you call an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court?
Annette!

Bill: "My homework is really difficult tonight, I've to write an essay on an elephant."?
Bert: "Well, for a start your going to need a big ladder.." Why do elephants do well in school?
Because they have a lot of grey matter!

Why shouldn't you take an elephant to the zoo?
Because he'd rather go to the movies!

What's blue and has big ears?
An elephant at the North Pole!

What's grey and lights up?
An electric elephant!

What's big and grey and protects you from the rain?
An umbrellaphant!

What do you do with a green elephant?
Wait till it ripens!

What is the difference between an elephant and a flea?
An elephant can have fleas but a flea can't have elephants!

A boy with an elephant on his head went to see a doctor. The doctor said, "You know you really need help"
"Yes I do", said the elephant, "get this kid off my foot!"

What happened to the elephant who ran away with the circus?
The police made him bring it back!

Why are elephants wiser than chickens?
Have you ever heard of Kentucky Fried Elephant?!

What do you call an elephant that can't do sums?
Dumbo!