funny insults jokes

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funny insults


you're stupid 19
 
 
A brief synopsis... When you're at a loss for words but want to tell someone that he or she is stupid, remember some these quips from our collection here at Aha! Jokes.



Even a two button mouse gives him too many options.

Evidence for the theory of a missing link.

Failed the Turing test.

Fell out of the family tree.

Fifty-one cards short of a full deck.

Fighting the war with a starter pistol / water pistol / pop gun / cap gun.

Finds a flat by swapping tires.

Finds canonical humor collections amusing.

Finds Sesame Street / knock-knock jokes challenging.

Fired from McDonald's for having a short attention span.

Fired her retro-rockets a little late.

Flaky.

Flat out like a lizard drinking.

Flying/landing on one engine.

Focused like a 12 gauge shotgun.

you're stupid 38
 
 
A brief synopsis... When you're at a loss for words but want to tell someone that he or she is stupid, remember some these quips from our collection here at Aha! Jokes.



Low-bandwidth as an information source.

Lugnuts rattling in the hubcaps.

Made a career out of mid-life crisis.

Mainspring's wound too tight.

Makes a black hole look bright.

Makes predictions that make weathermen/economists look good.

Memorized every Dr. Seuss story written.

Mental software is Version 1.0 / still in beta test.

Mentally qualified for handicapped parking.

Metronome needs oil.

Might still be a virgin except for what nature did to her mind.

Mind like a steel sieve.

Mind like a steel trap -- everything gets mangled / full of mice / nothing in, nothing out / rusted shut.

Missing a few buttons on his remote control.

Missing a few catalog cards / gears / marbles.

you're stupid 55
 
 
A brief synopsis... When you're at a loss for words but want to tell someone that he or she is stupid, remember some these quips from our collection here at Aha! Jokes.



Spent a decade on the leading edge of drug experimentation.

Still boots to DOS.

Still sending messages with his secret decoder ring.

Still traumatized from the forest fire in "Bambi".

Stocksy-babes. (A truly vile British-slang insult.)

Strong, like bull. Smart, like tractor. Beautiful, like KV-2. (A WWII era Russian tank.)

Stuck on the down escalator of life.

Stumped by anything child-proof.

Subtle as a well-thrown brick.

Suffers from Clue Deficit Disorder.

Supports nativist theories that man is formed from clay.

Surfing in Nebraska.

Switch is on, but no one's receiving.

Takes her 1.5 hours to watch "60 Minutes".

Takes her an hour to cook minute rice.

collection 07
 
 
I hear you are a real humanitarian. You have kept three or four detectives working regularly.

I hear you are connected to the Police Department -- by a pair of handcuffs.

Hello -- tall, dark and obnoxious!

You remind me of the ocean -- you make me sick.

You should have been born in the Dark Ages; you look terrible in the light.

All of your ancestors must number in the millions; it's hard to believe thatmany people are to blame for producing you.

Ever since I saw you in your family tree, I've wanted to cut it down.

I hear that when you were a child your mother wanted to hire someone to take care of you, but the Mafia wanted too much.

They just invented a new coffin just for you that goes over the head. It's for people who are dead from the neck up.

After hearing you talk, I now know that the dead do contact us.

You are so two-faced that any woman who married you would be married to a bigamist.

I always wanted to be a trouble-shooter, but now I see you are not worth it!


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