animal jokes for kids jokes

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animal jokes for kids


farm joke list 10
 
 
Why did the unwashed chicken cross the road twice?
Because he was a dirty double crosser!

What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!

What has two legs and flies?
A pig!

What do you get if you cross a cow with an octopus?
A cow that can milk itself!

Why did the farmer call his pig 'Ink'?
Because he kept running out of the pen!

What do you get from an Alaskan cow?
Cold cream!

What game do cows play at parties?
Moosical chairs!

Why is it called a 'herd' of cattle?
Well, have you 'herd' the sound they make!

Why was the lamb told off for being rude?
He would not say 'thank ewe' to his mum!

fish jokes
 
 
Which fish can perform operations?
A Sturgeon!

Where do little fishes go every morning?
To plaice school!

What fish goes up the river at 100mph?
A motor pike!

How could the dolphin afford to buy a house?
He prawned everything!

1st kipper: 'Smoking's bad for you'
2nd kipper: 'It's OK, I've been cured'

What kind of fish is useful in freezing weather?
Skate!

What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!

What lives in the ocean, is grouchy and hates neighbours?
A hermit crab!

What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?
As far away as possible!

Why did the whale cross the road?
To get to the other tide!

chicken jokes
 
 
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because chickens hadn't evolved yet Q: Why did the turtle cross the road?
A: To get to the shell station Q: Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
A: Because it was stuck to the chicken!

Q: Why did the horse cross the road?
A: Because the chicken needed a day off Q: Why did the cow cross the road?
A: To get to the udder side!

Q: Why did the chicken end up in the soup?
A: Because it ran out of cluck!

Q: What happened when the chicken ate cement?
A: She laid a sidewalk!

Q: What did the chicken do when he saw a bucket of fried chicken?
A: She kicked the bucket!

Q: What do you call a crazy chicken?
A: A cuckoo cluck!

Q: What happened to the chicken whose feathers were all pointing the wrong way?
A: She was tickled to death!

farm jokes
 
 
Why did the bull rush?
Because it saw the cow slip!

What kind of bird lays electric eggs?
A battery hen!

What do you call an arctic cow?
An eskimoo!

What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick-layer!

How do you fit more pigs on your farm?
Build a sty-scraper!

Why does a rooster watch TV?
For hentertainment!

What do you get from a drunk chicken?
Scotch eggs!

What do you call a crate of ducks?
A box of quackers!

What do you get if you cross a chicken with a bell?
A bird that has to wring its own neck!


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