animal jokes for kids jokes

Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep?
A: A stripey sweater!

Q: How do you know if your cat has eaten a duckling?
A: She's got that down in the mouth look!

Q: What do you get if you cross a cat with a canary?
A: A peeping tom!

Q: Why is the desert lion everyone's favorite at Christmas?
A: Because he has sandy claws!

Q: How does a lion greet the other animals in the field?
A: 'Pleased to eat you.'!

Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman?
A: Frostbite!

Q: What is a French cat's favorite pudding?
A: Chocolate mousse!

What do you get if you cross a cow with a camel?
Lumpy milkshakes!

What is the definition of a goose?
An animal that grows down as it grows up!

Why did Bo Peep lose her sheep?
She had a crook with her!

What do you give a pony with a cold?
Cough Stirrup!

What animal always goes to bed with its shoes on?
A horse!

What happens when geese land in a volcano?
They cook their own gooses!

What do you call a pig with no clothes on?
Streaky bacon!

What is a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis!

What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?
An udder failure!

What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment!

What is the most faithful insect?
A flea, once they find someone they like they stick to them!

What insect runs away from everything?
A flee!

What is the difference between a flea and a wolf?
One prowls on the hairy and the other howls on the prairie!

What to you call a Russian flea?
A Moscow-ito!

Two fleas where running across the top of a cereal packet?
"Why are we running so fast?
" said one Because it says "Tear along the dotted line" What do you call a flea that lives in an idiots ear?
A space invader!

What do you get if you cross a rabbit and a flea?
Bugs Bunny!

How do you start an insect race?
One, two, flea - go!

How do you find where a flea has bitten you?
Start from scratch!

What is a flea's favorite book?
The itch-hikers guide to the galaxy!

What is a worm's favorite band?
Mud!

What is the maggot army called?
The Apple Corps!

Why didn't the two worms get on Noah's Ark in an apple?
Because everyone had to go on in pairs!

Who is the worm's Prime Minister?
Maggot Thatcher!

How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm?
it has a blue light!

How can you tell which end of a worm is which?
Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs!

How do you make a glow worm happy?
Cut off his tail, he'll be de-lighted!

What did the worm say to the other when he was late home?
Where in earth have you been!

When should you stop for a glow worm?
When he has a red light!