Anti Joke jokes

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Anti Joke


motivational quotes for cannibals
 
 
"If we don't change the direction we're going, we're likely to end up at the wrong end."

"People who go out of their way to help others have great taste."

"An eye for an eye leaves everybody blind, but not hungry."

"Don't give up though the pace seems slow, you may succeed at another morgue."

"A journey of a hundred trillion cells begins with a single nibble."

"The only difference between a big shot and a little shot is that the big shot takes longer to chew."

"It's all right to have little butterflies in your stomach. In fact, I'd say a trip to the elementary school play is a wonderful idea."

"You don't know what your appetite can get away with until you try. Or are tried."

"If you carry your childhood with you, you should probably go the bathroom soon."

"Never keep up with Joneses. Have them over for dinner."

"Let your hook always be cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be a very startled swimmer."

where's ice cube, eve, and cedric?
 
 
Q: Where did the sheep get its haircut?

A: The ba-ba shop

a real wangsta
 
 
Q: What did the left leg say to the right leg?

A: That one in the middle thinks he's hard

martin scorscese is interviewing three ...
 
 
Martin Scorscese is interviewing three action heros for his new movie, they are Arnold Schwarzenneger, Bruce Willis and Sly Stallone. Pitching his movie he says, "This is gonna be an action flick with a twist...all three leads will be famous musical composers."

After some thought all three stars agree it's a new concept for an action flick and decide to get involved. In turn, Scorscese asks each star who they would like to play.

Bruce Willis pipes up first with "I've always wanted to play Mozart..." "Great, great!", enthuses Scorscese, "What about you, Sly?" Stallone thinks awhile and then says,"I've always liked Burt Baccarach's music, I'll be him." "Wonderful, wonderful, Sly", says Scorscese and, turning to Schwarzenneger he says "And how about you, Arnie?" Arnold thinks for a while and after some eye rolling and tutting turns to Scorscese and says.... "I'll be Bach."


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