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scary jokes


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A Halloween joke
What do witches eat at Halloween?
Spooketti, halloweenies, devils food cake and booberry pie!

A vampire joke
What's Dracula's car called?
A mobile blood unit!

A werewolf joke
What do you call a hairy beast with clothes on?
A wear-wolf!

A witch joke
Why did the witch go over the mountain?
Because she couldn't go under it!

A skeleton joke
Why didn't the skeleton want to play football?
Because his heart wasn't in it!

A cannibal joke
Why was the cannibal looking peeky?
Because he had just eaten a Chinese dog!

A wizard joke
If a wizard was knocked out by Dracula in a fight what would he be?
Out for the count!

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A witch joke
What name did the witch give to her cooking pot?
It was called-Ron!

A vampire joke
When do vampires bite you?
On wincedays!

A witch joke
What is a witch with poison ivy called?
An itchy witchy!

A Halloween joke
A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet on his head. "Are you a ghost?
" asked his friends "No, I'm an unmade bed!

" A cannibal joke
What's the definition of a cannibal?
Some who goes into a restaurant and orders a waiter!

A ghost joke
Why are cemeteries in the middle of towns?
Because they're dead centres!

A witch joke
What is a witches favourite book?
Broom at the top!

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A witch joke
How is the witches team doing?
They're having a spell in the first division!

A werewolf joke
How do you make a werewolf stew?
Keep him waiting for two hours!

A skeleton joke
What do you call a skeleton that is always telling lies?
A boney phoney!

A vampire joke
What does Mrs Dracula say to Mr Dracula when he goes out to work in the evening?
"Have a nice bite"!

A ghost joke
Why did the ghost go to the funfair?
He wanted to go on a rollerghoster!

A cannibal joke
How can you help a starving cannibal?
Give them a hand!

A cannibal joke
When do cannibals cook you?
On Fried-days!

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A Halloween joke
Why are teachers happy at Halloween parties?
Because there is lots of school spirit!

A demon joke
What do foreign devils speak?
Devil Dutch!

A ghost joke
What kind of ghosts haunt operating theatres?
Surgical spirits!

A skeleton joke
What happened when the skeletons rode pogo sticks?
They had a rattling good time!

A skeleton joke
What do you call a skeleton who presses the door bell?
A dead ringer!

A werewolf joke
What happened when the wolf fell in the washing machine?
He became a wash and werewolf!

A witch joke
What does a witch get if she is a poor traveller?
Broom sick!


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