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scary jokes


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A vampire joke
What happened to the mad vampire?
He went a little batty!

A demon joke
What is the best way to get rid of a demon?
Exorcise a lot!

A ghost joke
What kind of jewels to ghosts wear?
Tombstones!

A demon joke
Why do demons and ghouls get on so well?
Because demons are a ghouls best friend!

A vampire joke
Where do vampires go on holiday?
The Isle of Fright!

A vampire joke
What's a vampire's favourite soup?
Sharks' fang soup!

A vampire joke
Which vampire ate the three bears porridge?
Ghouldilocks!

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A witch joke
What is old, ugly and blue?
A witch holding it's breath!

A witch joke
What do you get if you cross a flea and a witch?
Very worried dogs!

A witch joke
What do witches sing at Christmas?
"Deck the halls with poison ivy...."!

A witch joke
What do witches eat for breakfast?
Rice krispies. Because they snap at them!

A witch joke
What do little witches like to play at school?
Bat's cradle!

A witch joke
What do witches eat for dinner?
Real toad in the hole!

A witch joke
Why did the witch have pedestrian eyes?
They looked both ways before they crossed!

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A witch joke
What do you call a witch you likes the beach but is scared of the water?
A chicken sandwitch!

A witch joke
Why did the witches go on strike?
They wanted sweeping reforms!

A witch joke
When a witch falls into a pond what is the first thing that she does?
Get wet!

A witch joke
What did the witch say to the ugly toad?
"I'd put a curse on you but it looks like someone already beat me to it"!

A wizard joke
What do you call a warlock who tries to stop fights?
A peacelock!

A wizard joke
What kinds of wizards can jump higher than a bus?
All of them, busses don't jump!

A wizard joke
What happened when the wizard drank a bottle of lemonade?
He burped 7-Up!

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A witch joke
Who went into a witche's den and came out alive?
The witch!

A witch joke
What is a witches favourite magazine?
The witch report!

A witch joke
What did the young witch say to her mother?
Can I have the keys to the broom tonight!

A witch joke
What's the best advice you can give to a witch on a broomstick?
Don't fly off the handle!

A witch joke
Who turns the lights off at halloween?
The light's witch!

A witch joke
Whats the difference between a broomstick and a pumpkin?
Ever tried broomstick pie?
!

A wizard joke
What do you call a wizard from outer space?
A flying sorcerer!


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