scary jokes jokes

A vampire joke
What happened at the vampires race?
It finished neck and neck!

A vampire joke
What's a vampire's favourite drink?
A bloody mary!

A ghost joke
Why did the car stop when it saw a ghost?
It had a nervous breakdown!

A vampire joke
What do vampires sing on New Year's Eve?
"Auld Fang Syne"!

A ghost joke
How do ghosts learn songs?
They read the sheet music!

A vampire joke
Why did Dracula go to the dentist?
He had fang decay!

A witch joke
What's the best way of seeing a witch?
On the television!

A vampire joke
What does a vampire say to the mirror?
Terror, terror on the wall...!

A skeleton joke
How do skeletons call their friends?
On the telebone!

A skeleton joke
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin!

A werewolf joke
Mummy, mummy what's a werewolf?
Be quiet and brush your face!

A werewolf joke
What parting gift did the werewolf parents give to their son when he left home?
A comb!

A witch joke
What is evil, ugly and goes at 125 mph?
A witch on a high speed train!

A skeleton joke
What's a skeleton's favourite musical instrument?
A trom-bone!

A ghost joke
Why are ghosts bad at telling lies?
Because you can see right through them!

A vampire joke
What does a vampire bath in?
A bat tub!

A werewolf joke
Why did the boy take a pain killer after hearing a werewolf howl?
Because it gave him eerie ache!

A vampire joke
What does Dracula say when you tell him something interesting?
Well fangcy that!

A werewolf joke
What do you call a hairy beast that is lost?
A where-wolf!

A vampire joke
What flavour ice cream is Dracula's favourite?
Veinilla!

A werewolf joke
What do you call a hairy beast in a river?
A weir-wolf!

A witch joke
What do you call a witch you likes the beach but is scared of the water?
A chicken sandwitch!

A witch joke
Why did the witches go on strike?
They wanted sweeping reforms!

A witch joke
When a witch falls into a pond what is the first thing that she does?
Get wet!

A witch joke
What did the witch say to the ugly toad?
"I'd put a curse on you but it looks like someone already beat me to it"!

A wizard joke
What do you call a warlock who tries to stop fights?
A peacelock!

A wizard joke
What kinds of wizards can jump higher than a bus?
All of them, busses don't jump!

A wizard joke
What happened when the wizard drank a bottle of lemonade?
He burped 7-Up!