improvements in hell
An engineer died and ended up in Hell. He was not pleased with the level of comfort in Hell, and began to redesign and build improvements. After a while, they had toilets that flush, air conditioning, and escalators. Everyone grew very fond of him.
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One day God called to Satan to mock him, "So, how's it going down there in Hell?"
Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."
God was surprised, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake. He should never have gotten down there in the first place. Send him back up here."
"No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer, and I'm keeping him."
God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I'll sue!"
Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"
lawyer vs. water fowl
Q: What can a goose do, that a duck can't do and a lawyer should do?
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A: Stick his bill up his ass.
buried lawyers
Q: What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their neck in sand?
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A: Not enough sand.
duck, duck, lawyer
What can a goose do that a duck can't but a lawyer should?
Shove its bill up its ass!
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Shove its bill up its ass!
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