Lawyer jokes

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Lawyer


lawyer and the skunk
 
 
What's the difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
the brass rat
 
 
A man walked into a curio store and was shopping around. After awhile, he chose a brass rat and brought it up to the counter.

"That will be $10 for the brass rat and $1,000 for the story behind it," said the proprietor.

"Thanks, but I'll just pay the $10 and pass on the story." He purchased the brass rat and left the store. As he was walking down the street, he started noticing all sorts of rats following him. The further he walked, the more rats followed. He walked down to the wharf and still more rats came out and followed him. So, he decided to walk out into the water, all the rats drowned. He returned to the store shortly.

"Ah-ha!" said the proprietor. "You've come back for the story, right?"

"Nope," said the man. "You have any brass lawyers?"

lawyers aren't the only ones to object
 
 
Q: What do lawyers use as contraceptives?

A: Their personalities.

lawyers and hot dog meat
 
 
Why have scientists started using lawyers for experiments instead of rats?

They don't become so attached to the lawyers.


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