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1) Something a blind man might use?
A sword
2) A Song with the word Moon in the title?
Blue Suede Moon
3) Name the Capital of France?
"F"
4) Name a bird with a long neck?
Naomi Campbell
5) Name an occupation where you might need a torch?
A burglar
6) Where is the Taj Mahal?
Opposite the dental hospital
7) What is Hitler's first name
Heil
8) As happy as.... (Larry gave a hint - think of my name)
A pig in sh*t
9) Some famous brothers
Bonnie and Clyde.
10) A dangerous race
The Arabs
11) Something that floats in a bath
Water
12) An item of clothing worn by the Three Musketeers
A horse
13) Something you wear on a beach
A deck-chair
14) A famous Royal
Mail
15) Something that flies that doesn't have an engine
A bicycle with wings
16) A famous bridge
The Bridge Over Troubled Waters
17) Something a cat does
Goes to the toilet
18) Something you do in the bathroom
Decorate
19) A method of securing your home
Put the kettle on
20) Something associated with pigs
The Police
21) A sign of the Zodiac
April
22) Something people might be allergic to
Skiing
23) Something you do before you go to bed
Sleep
24) Something you put on walls
A roof
25) Something slippery
A con-man
26) A kind of ache
A fillet of fish
27) A Jacket Potato topping
Jam
28) A food that can be brown or white
A potato
29) A famous Scotsman
Jock
30) A famous Welshman
Vinnie Jones
31) Something you open other than a door
Your bowels
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-A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
-If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
-Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.
-It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
-When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.
-No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.
-Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
-When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
-You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.
-Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds, unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.
-An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.
-Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment you turn the television on.
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A1: You take your foot off his head.
A2: Get the lead out of his ass.
A3: Chisel the concrete off his feet.
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