Entertainment jokes

What is pink and has 7 dents?

Snow White's cherry!

• JESUS is the Lord's shepherd. ELVIS dated Cybill Shepherd.
• JESUS was a carpenter. ELVIS' favorite high school class was wood shop.
• JESUS was part of the Trinity. ELVIS' very first band was a trio.
• JESUS' entourage, the Apostles, had 12 members. ELVIS' entourage, the Memphis Mafia, had 12 members.
• JESUS is a Capricorn. (December 25) ELVIS is a Capricorn. (January 8)
• JESUS was the lamb of God. ELVIS had mutton chop sideburns.
• JESUS' Father is everywhere. ELVIS' father was a drifter, and moved around quite a bit.
• JESUS said, "If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink."  (John 7:37) ELVIS said, "Drinks on me!" (Jailhouse Rock, MGM:1957)
• JESUS fasted for 40 days and nights. ELVIS had irregular eating habits. (eg: 5 banana splits for breakfast)
• JESUS said: "Man shall not live by bread alone." ELVIS liked his sandwiches with peanut butter and bananas.
• "[JESUS'] countenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow." (Matthew 28:3)  ELVIS wore snow-white jumpsuits with lightning bolts.
• JESUS said: "Love thy neighbor." (Matthew 22:39) ELVIS said: "Don't be cruel." (RCA 1956)
• JESUS walked on water. (Matthew 14:25) ELVIS surfed on water.  (Blue Hawaii, Paramount:1965)
• JESUS H. CHRIST has 12 letters. ELVIS PRESLEY has 12 letters.
• JESUS had his famous Resurrection. ELVIS had the famous 1968 "comeback" TV special.
• JESUS lived in a state of grace, in a Near Eastern land. ELVIS lived in Graceland, in a nearly eastern state.

The way this game works is every time the word f**k is used (in any form, ex. f**king, f**ker, etc.), or the word dude (in any form, ex. "his dudeliness, the dudester, etc.) is used, you take a drink. If you've seen the movie, you'll know that after five minutes of playing, you should be dialing 9-1-1. The main character's name is "Dude" and swearing, especially with the f-word, is quite excessive. Because both dude and f**k are used so much during the movie that we altered the rules to include that you can choose to only drink when one or the other word is said.

I can promise you this: Playing this game makes the movie make a lot more sense.

What advice does Cool Breeze give the fish?

'Watch for the Hook.'