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the businessman's medical problem
 
 
A businessman returns from the far east. After a few days he notices stange growth on his penis. He sees several doctors. They all say: “You've been screwing around in the Far East, very common there, no cure. We'll have to cut it off.” The man panics, but figures if it is common in the East they must know how to cure it. So he goes back and sees a doctor in Pakistan.

The doctor examines him and says, "You've been fooling around in my country. This is a very common problem here. Did you see any other doctors?”

The man replies, “Yes a few in the USA.”

The doctor says, "I bet they told you it had to be cut off."

The man answers, "Yes!"

The doctor smiles, nods, "That is not correct. It will fall off by itself."

linguistic lapses
 
 
In a Bangkok dry-cleaner's shop: Drop your trousers here for best results.
Outside a Hong Kong dress shop: Ladies have fits upstairs.
In a Copenhagen airline office: We take your bags & send them in all directions.
In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend your afternoon having a good time.
Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride own your own ass?
an egyptian man is walking...
 
 

    An Egyptian man is walking through the Cairo bazaar, when a stranger comes up to him and offers to sell Viagra (illegal in Egypt) for 100 Egyptian pounds.

    "No, not worth it!"

    "OK, how about 50 Egyptian pounds?"

    "No, not worth it!"

    "OK, 20?"

    "No, not worth it!"

    "How about 10?"

    "No, not worth it!"

    "Listen, these pills cost US $10 each. How can you say they are not worth it?"

    "Oh, the pills ARE worth it. My wife is not worth it."

the chinese workman
 
 
A building contracter hires an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Chinaman. He gathers them all in his office and tells each of them their jobs. The Englishman to shovel a pile of sand. The Irishman has to take the sand in the wheelbarrow to the truck. The Chinaman is in charge of supplies.

The boss comes back two hours later and he sees the Englishman and the Irishman having a cup of tea. 'So have you done the work then?' he asks.

The workers both shake their heads and tell him that the Chinaman didn't give them a shovel or a wheelbarrow. The boss is infuriated by this and asks the workers if they have seen the Chinaman, they tell him they thought they saw him going toward the truck. So the boss sets out towards the truck and just as he is getting close to the truck the Chinaman jumps out from behind a wall and yells, "SUPPLIES!"


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