Foreign jokes

What's the difference between greeting the Queen of England and greeting Bill Clinton?

You only have to get down on one knee to greet the queen.

How can you tell the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?
Terrorists can be negotiated with.

After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother wearily arrived at Rhein-Main Air Base in Germany with my eight siblings and me -- all under age 11. Collecting our many suitcases, the ten of us entered the cramped customs area. A young customs official watched our entourage in disbelief, 'Ma'am,' he said, 'do all these children and this luggage belong to you?'

'Yes, sir,' my mother said with a sigh, 'they're all mine.'

The customs agent began his interrogation: 'Ma'am, do you have any weapons, contraband or illegal drugs in your possession?'

'Sir,' she calmly answered, 'if I'd had any of those items, I would have used them by now.'

Guns don't kill people.

Texans kill people.