move out of my space!
There were three astronauts an American, a Russian, and a Pollock who were discussing who had the best space program. The Russian says, "We have the best space program. We were the first country to put a satellite into orbit." The American replies, "Thats nothing, we put the first man on the moon." Then the man Pollock says, "No, we are the best, we are going to put the first man on the sun." The Russian and the American arguedm, "Thats not possible you would burn." The Pollock explains, "No, no, we have it all planned out. See we will go at night!"
keeping in under the kilt
In Scotland, the most
important time for a young lad is when he "comes of age" and is allowed to
purchase and wear his first kilt.
A couple of weeks before,
his important birthday, a young lad went to a tailor shop and found the material he wanted
for his first kilt. He took the material to the tailor and said, "I'd like ye to make
me a kilt with this material here and, if ye don't mind, I'd like ye to make me a pair of
matching underwear for it. I hear it gets a might drafty up dem tings!"
So the tailor took the
material and promised to call the young lad when the order was completed.
A few days later, the tailor
called the lad back to the shop. "Here's ye kilt, and here's ye matching underwear,
and here's five yards of the material left over. Ye might want to take it home and keep it
in case you want anything else made of it."
So the lad rushed home with
his order, threw the material in his room, and donned his kilt. In his excitement, he
decided to run to his girlfriend's house to show off his new purchase.
Unfortunately, in his
excitement, he forgot to don his underwear.
When his girlfriend
answered the door, he pointed to his kilt and said, "well, what'd ye think?"
"Ah, but dat's a fine
looking kilt," she exclaimed.
"Aye, and if ye like
it, ye'll really like what's underneath," he stated as he lifted his kilt to show
here.
;Oh, but dat's a
dandy," his girlfriend shouted admiringly.
Still not realizing that he
didn't have his underwear on he exclaimed quite proudly, "aye, and if ye like it,
I've got five more yards of it at home!"
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