Foreign jokes

A man was heading to England and his next-door neighbor Mrs. Dunn had just sent her son Olmos off to England a week ago. He hadn't called since he was there, so she asked the man to get him to call her. She knew he was staying in a big white house so she told him that.

When he arrived in England, the man asked the first person he saw for the big white house. Thinking he meant the outhouse, the Brit said, 'It is in the middle of the park.' So the man went to the park and saw a white house in the center.

He knocked on the door and said, 'Are you Olmos Dunn?'

A voice came from inside, 'Yeah, I just have to find the toilet paper.'

There were these 3 criminals who had just robbed a bank in Egypt. They were caught, convicted, and sentenced to exile in the Sahara Desert and they could each take only one thing. When they met in the desert they each were telling what they had brought.
"I brought a loaf of bread, so when I get hungry, I'll have something to eat," said the first criminal.
"I brought a water skin, so that when I get thirsty, I'll have something to drink," said the second.
"I brought a car door, so that when it gets hot I can roll down the window."

Father: Son at your age, Winston Churchill used be up and out for his morning walk at 5 a.m..

Son: Dad, at your age, he had become the Prime Minister of England.

Q: Why did the chicken say, "Meow, oink, bow-wow, and moo?"

A: He was studying foreign languages.