Foreign jokes

Q: How do you get a German out of the bath?
A: Turn on the water.

Are you harboring a fugitive- Hu Yu Hai Ding
See me A.S.A.P. - Kum Hia Nao
Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni
Your price is too high - No Bai Dam Thing
Did you go to the beach - Wai Yu So Tan
I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Bang Mai Ni
I think you need a facelift - Chin Tu Fat
It's very dark in here - Wai So Dim?
Has your flight been delayed? - Hao Long Wei Ting?
That was an unauthorized execution.- Lin Ching
I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching?
This is a tow away zone. - No Pah King
You are not very bright - Yu So Dum
I got this for free - Ai No Pei
I am not guilty - Wai Hang Mi?
Please, stay a while longer - Wai Go Nao?
Our meeting was scheduled for next week - Wai Yu Kum Nao
They have arrived - Hia Dei Kum
Stay out of sight - Lei Lo
He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka
Does this bathroom stink! Hu Flung Dung?

What's the highest position in the Greek Navy?
Rear Admiral!

A truck driver had a 2 day lay-over during the St. Patrick's Day holiday. He was getting bored with just sitting at the truck stop cafe, so he decided to go for a few beers. After about the 4th one, he had to use the bathroom badly. He went into the bathroom, and he was peeing, lhe ooked into the next stall and noticed a leprechaun whose penis was HUGE!

"Let me ask you something...how come short guys have bigger peckers than tall guys?"

In his heavy Irish accent, the leprechaun looked up and said, "I don't know laddy, i'm a leprechaun".

With that, the trucker reached out and grabbed him and said, "Well guess what? I caught ya!"

"Aye lad, that ya did, but your wishes won't come true until tomorrow morning".

The trucker was confused by this, "Why not? You're a leprechaun, I caught ya, so you are supposed to grant me 3 wishes."

"Well", began the leprechaun, "you don't know anything about us leprechauns. We get a day of the year off and it happens to be St. Patrick's Day." Well, the trucker understanding this made his 3 wishes. He wanted to own his trucking company, he wanted every woman he saw to desire his body and he wanted 10 million dollars in the bank, tax free. The leprechaun said it would be done in the morning. On his way out of the restroom, the leprechaun says, "Lad, would you like to have your wishes come true tonight?"

"Well yeah, but what's the catch?", came the reply. "Well, you gotta let a leprechaun corn-hole ya." The trucker, at first protested, but then the leprechaun reminded him of all that he would be gaining in few precious moments. Thinking about the money, the company becoming his and ALL those women, he agreed but told the leprechaun not to tell anyone. When it was all over, the leprechaun was getting ready to leave, turned to the trucker and said, "Laddy, can I ask ya a question?"

"Sure", says the trucker.

"How old are ya now?"

"I'm 40 years old" says the trucker.

With that, the leprechaun says, "You mean to tell me that you're 40 years old and still believe in leprechauns?"