funny answering machine messages jokes

Hello, this is Rip van Winkle. I'm not awake to take your call right now. Please leave your message at the sound of the snore.

Voice 1: Gee, Dave, what do you feel like doing tonight?

Voice 2: Same thing we do every night, Rob... Try to take over

the world! (Sing:)

They're David and the Rob,

Yes, David and the Rob,

One is a drummer, the other needs a job.

They're not at home right now, so please don't have a cow,

Leave a message -- for David and the Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob.

Meat Loaf's "I'd Do Anything For Love":

And I would do anything for calls,

I promise I will call you back;

I would do anything for calls,

But I can't talk right now and that's a fact.

I'm not home right now, so I just can't answer the phone,

No way,

But I would do anything for calls,

Oh, I would do anything for calls!

Just let me know who it was who called,

And I'll call you back!

Yes, I'll call you back!

Just leave a message at the tone,

I'll hear it when I get back home,

And I will call -- you -- back!

U2's "With or Without You":

No one's here to answer the phone,

Leave a message at the tone,

And we'll get back to you.

We'll get back to you!