Sports jokes

You give them a quarter and they'll let you score!

Waiting at the cross street for the light to change, he noticed a beautiful blonde standing next to him and smiling.

"What are those big bulges in your running shorts?" she asked.

"Tennis balls," answered the man, smiling back.

"Wow," said the blonde, looking upset. "That must hurt. I once had tennis elbow and the pain was unbearable."

* You only come out of your room if your theme music is playing

* When your boss is pissing you off you kick him and give him a stunner

* You always end a speech with, 'That's the bottom line 'cuz John said so!' or 'If you smellllll what John is cooking!'

* Your new wardrobe consists of more multi-colored bicep tassles, tights, and capes

* If there's one beer left you suggest it should be suspended from the ceiling and the winner has to climb a stepladder to get it

* Whenever you see someone lying on the floor you get the urge to put him in the sharpshooter

The brush is quite thick, but Jim searches diligently and suddenly he spots something shiny. As he gets closer, he realizes that the shiny object is in fact an 8-iron in the hands of a skeleton lying near an old golf ball.

Jim calls out to his golfing partner in an agitated voice, "Hey Bob, come here, I got trouble down here."

Bob comes running over to the edge of the ravine and calls out, "What's the matter Jim?"

Jim shouts back, "Throw me my 7-iron! You can't get out of here with an 8-iron."