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classic baseball quotes
 
 
"It was too bad I wasn't a second baseman; then I'd probably have seen a lot more of my husband."
--Karolyn Rose, ex-wife of Pete Rose, 1981

"It's a weird scene. You win a few baseball games and all of a sudden, you're surrounded by reporters and TV men with cameras asking you about Vietnam and race relations."
--Vida Blue, 1971

"I watch a lot of baseball on the radio."
--Gerald Ford, 1978

"It's a beautiful day for a night game."
--Announcer Frankie Frisch

"The most important things in life are good friends and a strong bull pen."
--Pitcher Bob Lemon, 1981

"Well, that kind of puts a damper on another Yankees win."
--Announcer Phil Rizzuto, after a news bulletin reporting the death of Pope Paul VI, 1978

"They brought me up with the Brooklyn Dodgers, which at time was in Brooklyn."
--Casey Stengel, 1962

"I won't play for a penny less than $1500."
--Honus Wagner, turning down an offer of $2000

a kooky race joke
 
 
What do you call 300 white men chasing a black man?

The PGA tour.

unfaithful wives
 
 
Paddy and his two friends are talking at a bar.

His first friend says: "I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren't mine."

His second friend says: "I think my wife is having an affair with the plumber. The other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn't mine."

Paddy says: "I think my wife is having an affair with a horse." Both his friends look at him with utter disbelief.

"No, I'm serious. The other day I came home and found a jockey under our bed."

baseball humor
 
 
Why are baseball players so cool?

They always have their fans there!


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