Sports jokes

On the seventh day, God said, "Let there be football."

And it was good.

Later that day, God said, "Let there be one team to rule the others and set the standard for excellence."

With that, he plucked a star from the heavens and placed it on the helmet of silver and blue.

God said, "Let it be called, 'The Dallas Cowboys' - America's team."

Later that day, God said, "Even Cowboys need a**holes."

So he made their fans.

There is no truth to the rumor that the Florida Orange Growers have offered O.J. Simpson $3 million to change his name to Snapple....

What does OJ have that every man wants?

A Heisman trophy and a dead ex-wife!

Two fraternity brothers decide to go sailing one afternoon and become lost. After twenty hours with nothing to eat or drink, one of them spots a lamp floating by. He picks it up and a genie pops out. The genie notices the poor condition of the brothers and grants them one wish between the two of them.

After a lot of arguing over who gets the wish, one of them blurts out, "I wish the ocean was made of beer."

Magically, the ocean turns to beer.

Infuriated, the other guy yells, "You idiot! Now we have to piss in the boat!"