Children jokes

Five little pigs walk into a bar. The first pig asks the bartender for a beer. The pig finishes the beer and asks where the bathroom is.

The second pig goes up to the bartender and asks for two beers. The second pig finishes the two beers and asks where the bathroom is.

The third and fourth pig go up to the bartender and ask for three and four beers. After finishing their beers, they ask where the bathroom is.

The fifth pig goes up to the bar, but before he can order, the bartender says, "You don't have to say anything, you want five beers, right?"

The fifth pig says to him, "Right, but I'm the pig that goes wee wee all the way home.

Three boys were sitting on some steps watching cars go by. They see a Cadillac Escalade drive by and the first boy says, "I wish i could have that Cadillac. The second boy says, "I wish I could have that Lincoln Navigator behind it. The third boy says, "i wish my whole body was covered in curly hair because my sister has a small patch between her legs and that is how she got both of those cars.

A little boy and girl were playing doctor. The little boy boldly pulled off his shirt and pointed to his nipples.

"I've got two of these," he said. "How about you?" The little girl opened her blouse and showed him her nipples. So the boy pointed to his belly button. The little girl looked down showed him her belly button. So the little boy dropped his drawers and pointed to his penis. The little girl raised her skirt and pulled her underwear to the side, but search as she might she couldn't find that particular organ. The little boy taunted her till she ran home to her mommy. She returned 15 minutes later with a big grin on her face.

"My mommy told me that when I am 15 years old, I'll have as many of those as I want!"

Little Johnny was in class when the teacher asked, "Three birds are sitting on a telephone wire, a hunter shoots one. How many are left?" "None," he says "if ones shot the others would fly away." "Actually", said the teacher "the answer was two, but I like the way you think." The next day Johnny walks over to his teacher in the cafeteria and asks, "Do you see those three women over there on the bench? Which one isn't married, the one eating the cookie, the one eating a sandwich, or the one sucking on a popsicle?" "Hmm, the one sucking on a popsicle?", the teacher asks" "Actually" said Timmy " it was the one without a wedding ring, but I like the way you think".