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english, irish & scottish football
 
 
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are wandering through the desert, hungry and hallucinating, when they come upon a rotting, dead camel.

"Well," said the Englishman, "I support the Liverpool football club, so I'll eat the liver."

"I support the Hearts club," said the Scotsman, "so I'll eat the heart."

"I support Arsenal," said the Irishman, "but I seem to have lost my appetite."

ocean highway hijinx
 
 
A man walking along the beach finds a magic lamp with a genie. The genie promises to grant him whatever wish he wants.
"Okay," says the man, "I would like a highway across the oceans."
"Hrm," says the genie. "Is there anyway you could wish for something smaller?"
"How 'bout three Polish women with IQs over 90?"
"How many lanes do you want for your highway?"
sardarji on the mountain
 
 
Once a Sardarji (a caste man in India ) goes to visit a temple on a top of Mt. Abu, where the roads are like a zig-zag.

At the starting point towards the Temple, a man tells Sardarji that it will be better to take his car in reverse to the top of Mt. Abu as there will be no space at the top to turn around up there.

So, as per the guidelines given by the man, The Sardarji, goes to the top of Mt. Abu in reverse.

After sometime the Sardarji comes down of the hill in reverse..

When the man sees him, he asks the Sardarji why he came down the hill in a reverse gear.

The Sardarji replies that he got some space at the top of the hill so he reversed his car.

stand-up gandhi
 
 
A man once asked Gandhi what he thought of western civilization.
'I think it would be a good idea.'

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