Children jokes

Jokes » children » humor 62

Children


smart pills
 
 
One day two boys were walking through the woods when they saw some rabbit turds. One of the boys said, 'What is that?'

'They're smart pills,' said the other boy. 'Eat them and they'll make you smarter.

So he ate them and said, 'These taste like sh*t.'

'See,' said the other boy, 'you're getting smarter already.'

the truth
 
 
At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth" -- even when you don't know anything.

The boy decides to go home and try it out. As he is greeted by his mother at the front door he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father."

Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother."

Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug."

playing doctor
 
 
Two children were in a doctor's waiting room. The little girl was softly sobbing.

"Why are you crying?" asked the little boy.

"I'm here for a blood test, and they're going to cut my finger," said the girl.

When he heard this, the little boy started to cry.

"Why are you crying?" asked the girl.

The boy looked at her worriedly and said, "I'm here for a urine test."

father's day product placement
 
 
On Father's Day, a little boy decides to make his dad breakfast in bed. He makes scrambled eggs, toast and coffee. He brings it into his dad, hands him the cup of coffee and says,'Try it dad.'

The dad takes a sip and nearly passes out because it is so strong. The little boy asks,'How do you like it Dad?'

The dad doesn't want to hurt the little boy's feelings so he says, 'This is....something else, I've never tasted coffee quite like this before, Son.'

The little boy smiles from ear to ear. And says, 'Drink some more Pops.'

As the dad is drinking, he notices two army men in the bottom of the cup, and says,'Hey! Why did you put army men in here?'

The little boy again smiles and sings,'The Best Part Of Waking Up, Is SOLDIERS In Your Cup.'


Page 63 of 72     «« Previous | Next »»