Sports jokes

* You wonder why singers Sting, Wolf Blitzer, and Bryan Adams stole wrestlers' names

* You only come out of your room if your theme music is playing

* When your boss is pissing you off you kick him and give him a stunner

* You always end a speech with, 'That's the bottom line 'cuz John said so!' or 'If you smellllll what John is cooking!'

* Your new wardrobe consists of more multi-colored bicep tassles, tights, and capes

* If there's one beer left you suggest it should be suspended from the ceiling and the winner has to climb a stepladder to get it

* Whenever you see someone lying on the floor you get the urge to put him in the sharpshooter

Have you heard that OJ is starting a new Airport Limo service?

His motto is, "We get you there with time to kill!"

Yo' mama so short, she plays racquetball with the curb!

A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I have the chance to go fishing for a week. It's the opportunity of a lifetime. We leave right away, so can you pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and especially my blue silk pajamas? I'll be home in an hour to pick them up."

He hurries home, grabs everything and rushes off.

A week later he returns. His wife asks, "Did you have a good trip?"

"Oh yes, great! But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas."

"Oh no I didn't. I put them in your tackle box."