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'Well, how much does a brain cost?' asked the relatives.
'For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000,' replied the doctor.
Some of the younger male relatives tried to look shocked, but all the men nodded because they thought they understood. But the patient's daughter was unsatisfied and asked, 'Why the difference in price between male brains and female brains?'
'Standard pricing practice,' said the doctor. 'Women's brains have to be marked down because they've actually been used.'
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The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight and found it somewhat below normal. The doctor asked if the baby was breast fed or bottle fed.
"Breast fed," the woman replied.
"Well, strip down to your waist," the doctor asked. She did. He pressed, kneaded, rolled, cupped, and pinched both breasts in a detailed, rigorously thorough examination.
Motioning for her to get dressed he said, "No wonder this baby is under weight! You don't have any milk."
"I know," she said, "I'm his grandmother, but I'm glad I came."
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She stuck out her foot and said, "CORNS".
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