A week goes by and the lady shows back up at the doctor's office and the doctor asks her how it went. The lady heaves a tremedous sigh and explains, "I snuck it into his coffee like you said. And, sure enough, within 15 minutes, he cleared off the table, threw me on it and we had the best sex we'd had in 20 years." Perplexed, the doctor asks, "What's wrong with that?" And the lady schakes her head and says, "I don't think i'll be able to show my face at McDonalds again."
A couple of weeks later he returned to his practice. His secretary wondered why it took him so long to return. 'Well, it hurt alot more than I thought it would.'
Then she asked him, 'What part hurt the most? Was it when they cut off your penis or when they pumped you full of air to make your breasts that big?'
He said 'Well, that hurt, but not bad enough to keep me at home for so long. What hurt the most was when they drilled a hole in my head and pumped out half of my brains!'
Upon hearing this, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction and a tummy tuck. She even had someone change her hair color. Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.
She was released from the hospital but while crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by a car.
Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 43 years?! Why didn't you pull me out of the path of that car?"
God replied, "I didn't recognize you."
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