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rover the brick
 
 
A policeman is walking down the road when he sees a man with a brick tied to a dog leash. He decides to go and humor him. He walks up to the man and says, 'Hello, sir, I like your dog!'

The man looks at the brick, then the policeman, and says, 'It's not a dog, it's a brick.'

The policeman replies, 'Oh, sorry, I thought you were a bit mad,' and walks off rather puzzled.

As the policeman goes out of sight, the man turns to the brick and says, 'That fooled him, didn't it Rover?'

rhoids
 
 
"How are your hemorrhoids?"

"Swell."

a little testy
 
 
A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the doctor had prescribed testosterone (a male hormone) for her. She was a little worried about some of the side effects she was experiencing.

'Doctor, the hormones you've been giving me have really helped, but I'm afraid that you're giving me too much. I've started growing hair in places that I've never grown hair before.'

The doctor reassured her, 'A little hair growth is a perfectly normal side effect of testosterone. Just where has this hair appeared?'

'On my testicles, which is something else I want to talk to you about...,' replied the lady.

i see you!
 
 
A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it.

Once he was in the doctor's office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he looked up the man's arse was that eye staring right back at him. "You know, " said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."


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