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His mother.
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He went to the medicine cabinet, pulled out a bottle and began to swallow a handful of Prozac pills he found there.
After the first few he felt a lot better.
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Because it would have been named a Teethbrush if someone else had.
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"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed the young nurse replies, "I don't know, I'm only here to wash your face and hands."
He struggles again to ask, "Nurse, Are my testicles black?"
Again the nurse replies, "I can't tell. I'm only here to wash your face and hands."
The ward nurse passes by and sees the man getting a little distraught so she marches over to inquire what is wrong.
"Nurse," he mumbles, "Are my testicles black?"
Being a nurse she is undaunted. She whips back the bedclothes, pulls down his pajama trousers, moves his penis out of the way, has a good look, pulls up the pajamas, replaces the bedclothes and announces, "Nothing is wrong with them."
At this the man pulls off his oxygen mask and asks again,
"Are my test results back?"
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