News And Politics jokes

At a recent rally Bob Dole was asked if he wore boxers or briefs.

He replied, 'Depends.'

A reporter cornered George W. Bush at a press conference:

"Many say the only reason you were elected for President is due to the enormous power and influence of your father."

"That notion is ridiculous!" mocked George Jr. "It doesn't matter how powerful the man is. He was only allowed to vote once!"

You know about the 39 Heaven's Gate culters who killed themselves?

They found another one underneath the sink...behind the Comet.

There were five people on a crashing air plane. Britney Spears, George W. Bush, Pavarotti, the Pope, and a boy scout. There were only four parachutes, not enough for the five important people on board, so they had to decide who would be left. President Bush said he should go first since he is the president of the greatest country in the world. So he jumps and lands safely. Then Pavarotti says that he has the greatest voice in the world so jumps and parachutes to safety. Britney Spears says she's a role model for young girls, a sex icon, and the smartest woman in the world so she jumps out. Then the Pope says to the little boy scout, "I am old and feeble and I don't have much longer to live...You must take the last parachute." The boy scout replies, "We can both take a parachute because the smartest woman in the world took my backpack."