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clinton -vs- titanic
Similarities between the Titanic video and the Clinton grand jury testimony video:

Titanic: $9.99 on the Internet
Clinton: $9.99 on the Internet

Titanic: over 3 hours long
Clinton: over 3 hours long

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe
Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe

Titanic: villain - White Star Line
Clinton: villain - Ken Starr

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist
Clinton: Bill is a B.S. artist

Titanic: In one part, Jack enjoys a good cigar
Clinton: Ditto for Bill

Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined
Clinton: Ditto for Monica

Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit
Clinton: Let's not go there

Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry
Clinton: Monica forced to return her gifts

Titanic: Behind the scenes, Leonardo DiCaprio is wildly popular
Clinton: Behind the scenes, Bill has a 70% approval rating

Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death
Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary

bad lawyer
Q: What do you call a lawyer who has gone bad?

A: Senator.

national bird
Did you hear Clinton announced a new national bird?
The spread eagle!
international beer syndrome
An insect falls into a mug of beer.
English Man: Throws his mug of bear on the floor and walks out.
American Man: Takes out the insect and drinks tbe beer.
Chinese Man: Eats the insect and throws the beer.
Indian Man: Sells the insect to the Chinese and the beer to the Englishman and buys himself a new mug of beer.
Pakistani Man: Accuses the Indian of throwing the insect into his mug, relates the issue to Kashmir, asks the Chinese for military aid and takes a loan to buy another mug of beer.

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